Chapter 44

The sheets have never felt heavier.

Like a weight on my shoulders, restricting any attempts, best advised to banish any thoughts of escape or of retreat without waking her up. She stopped. She said she didn't want to but when the time came she pulled away, wrapped the larger part around her and threw her back against me.

Waiting for when I'd 'stop punishing her'. I couldn't make any sense of what that meant at that moment because well, yeah. But now, staring at the ceiling, laying in the cushy bed and beautiful bedroom I intended for Paige and I, I understand.

And now I'm glad she stopped, she did us both a favour. But she's right, I can't keep punishing her, I can't not acknowledge her feelings and mine, I can't dismiss that there's something here, between us. Something full of warmth and joy, at the very least I've got to decide, to stop making things so complicated.