Fortune Telling (2)
"Okay, Handsome Gege, sit down."
The girl wearing a poster dragged Xiaojun to come and sit on the chair directly facing the supposed fortune-teller.
The fortune-teller smirked and then started speaking with her try-hard mysterious voice, "Welcome to—Ack!" The fortune teller was about to say something when her friend accidentally stepped on her Dora and Boots sheet and pulled her neck.
"Ah, sorry, sorry!" the friend apologized. The fortune-teller glared at her and then fixed her 'robe.' She sat on her seat again and then tried to speak in that same mysterious voice.
…
'Definitely not a good start,' Xiaojun said in his heart.
"Welcome, Handsome Brother. I see that you're interested in seeing your future. Do you want to see your money? Your family circle? Or just your love life?"
Feng Xiaojun stared at the crystal ball on the table. If he remembered correctly, he also saw someone actually sold the same thing in front of the school, like a stand of miscellaneous items.
'Did this girl just buy the crystal ball from outside just now?' Xiaojun kept on thinking.
The girl watched the handsome brother, and then he said, "Gege, I see the other gege with you just now actually had a huge crush on you in the past, and you might be the realization of him turning gay, but only for you."
Feng Xiaojun almost jumped out of his seat. His eyes widened as he gawked at the girl, "H—How did you know?"
"Hehe, told you, right? I am Madame LeLies! I am a totally legit fortune-teller! Don't see me just because I am a high school student. I'm actually a demon from the nether realm, an envoy from my lord, Endless Entity! Muahahaha!"
"Oi, look at Wei Fangsong! She still has her delusion as the demon girl since eighth grade, ahahaha!" One boy who passed laughed at the fortune-teller.
"Ish, shut up! Just go now, you ass!" The fortune-teller yelled at the boy. Then she continued, "Okay, Handsome brother, I will be reading your love life since you seem to be most concerned about that, am I right?"
…
'Am I the stupid one here to actually sit and listen to her?' Xiaojun pondered. But he nodded in response to that question, and the fortune-teller started chanting some gibberish words in a language that seems to be Spanish.
—
Báilame como si fuera la última vez
Y enséñame ese pasito que no sé
Un besito bien suavecito, bebé
Taki taki
Taki taki, rumba!
—
Xiaojun frowned as he continued pondered, 'Wait, is this a song? I think this is a song, but I'm too old to know about this. I heard it on the radio in my car once, though…."
"Taki Taki Rumba! Aiyayayaya!" The girl chanted again, and then she stared at her magic crystal.
"Hmm… I see… I see… this is quite difficult. Hmm…" the girl mumbled. "This is a blessing, but a difficult blessing…"
Xiaojun got curious as the girl kept on mumbling, and then he asked, "What? What did you see?"
"Hmmm… handsome brother, I see that you have such a bland love life for your whole life without anyone by your side. Until your life suddenly turned upside down, maybe you're the main character of a BL novel? It seems there are three very handsome, well-known, and rich men who are chasing you right now."
Xiaojun gawked even more, when he heard this. Because this girl actually told him about exactly three men who were haunting him right now, "H—How did you know?"
"Well, I've been showered by the power of my lord, Endless Entity! But, he said that you need to give me money first, so I can continue my reading, hehe~."
"What is that Endless Entity anyway?"
"Hehe, it's a character from a novel that I love, called Awakening of Endless Entity! It's cool stuff. You must read it!"
'Why does this feel like an advertisement?' Feng Xiaojun pondered and then sighed, "How much do you need?"
"Good brother, I'm charging for cheap. I just need around ten thousand Yuan for your reading. Because your fortune reading is like… hard stuff, hehe~."
Xiaojun rolled his eyes. It was only 1500 dollars anyway. Xiaojun fished out his wallet and gave her a credit card, "Do you accept Credit Card?"
"Certainly!" The girl snatched the credit card. After the transaction was done, the girl chanted a random song again and then nodded alongside a continuous hum.
"Handsome brother, I see that you're loved by a handsome mafia boss with a daughter. He even wants you to be his wife and mother/second father for his daughter. You're loved by that handsome brother who walked with you just now. He's even ready to marry you whenever you want to…."
"And, there is this mysterious figure. I cannot see clearly, but he is a BL author as a side job but actually very popular with his real identity," the girl described three men in his life right now precisely.
'Papa Dragon, Xing'an, Zhu'er…' Xiaojun thought. 'Wait... Zhu'er is actually very popular? Is he an actor or something?'
"But I see that you're still doubtful of which one to choose. You're still scared of yourself and your own life, so romance is still out of the question for you. I believe that you should accept yourself first, Handsome brother," the girl said. "Don't try to fit in just because of the society. It will only hurt you for your lifetime…."
Feng Xiaojun was stunned because that was what he experienced right now. He knew that he was gay, but he had to fit in for society, and incredibly, for his homophobic mom.
…
"I have one more question," Xiaojun asked. "Which one will be my spouse in the future?"
"Wait, let me check first," the girl continued her chanting and then nodded. "This is very interesting, handsome brother, you will end up with—"
"Xiao-Ge, I got your food!" Jinxing suddenly showed up and dragged Xiaojun away. "Let's go eat somewhere!"
"W—Wait, I—" Xiaojun wanted to know the answer, but Jinxing kept on pulling him. "No time, let's go! I'm hungry! I bought you your favorite steamed dumpling!"
Xiaojun sighed and then ignored the rest of his fortune-telling to follow Jinxing.
Meanwhile, the fortune-teller just shrugged nonchalantly, "Oh well, it doesn't matter anyway. I just hope that handsome brother's chrysanthemum and big member will be alright after so many activities every night. Tsk, tsk~"