| These New and Old Encounters (Part 3)

Sung-Ho watched as Soo-Ah's steps carried her further from him, his fist clenching on the tent's flap until he drew it closed harshly.

How did the gods give him the strength to abstain?

He would have ravished her on the desk, on the floor, against the sturdy tent pole. The bed was too far. Because if they would have made it to the bed, he would have kept her there for days. Feeling no other kind of hunger except what they had for each other, drinking only when their lips became too parched from so much kissing, claiming her over and over until his muscles ached. Until she would say she could take it no more.

The inner beast he kept tamed until now came back to life and was begging to be set loose.

Soo-Ah gave her first kiss to him. But could he commit to what it implied? Transfixed, he bit his lips and touched them. What a clumsy kiss she gave him. How innocent she was; such a blank canvas for his desires and all the more reason he wanted her. He could teach her how to part her mouth and move her tongue, how to sample instead of biting and when to bite instead of tasting.

He was in a haze and staggered for a couple of steps until he bumped against his desk where reality hit him in the face. He leaned over his strategy board and looked at it again. His duty. Such a fool he was, squandering his energy and his attention when they were needed for more important matters. With good reason, he'd kept himself away from these life indulgences; they were like opium, feeding that monster who ate away at his power and focus.

"That simple girl is not important. War and duty are important," he recited like a mantra, rubbing his temples, but it was no use. He was doomed to crave her and there will be at least a month until he could see her again. Unless time would turn out to be his ally and a month was enough to file down this disease afflicting his heart and his loins. He leaned over the open maps.

One month until he would see her... Too long! Frustration ran its course under his skin. His hands turn into fists, pressing hard against the hardwood of the top of the table. In one swift move, he swept the surface of his desk. The inkstone, charts, documents, paperweights, everything was sent flying to the floor.

Staring at the aftermath of his outburst, he remembered there was a reason he held his savage impulses under control and stayed away from romantic afflictions. He began to laugh in self-derision. Even his anger had been wasted on a couple of desk ornaments when it could have been usefully spent on the battlefield.

All because of a feeling that will remain unwanted, denied, and unnamed.

*

Soo-Ah took a walk through the encampment to regain her calm. What she needed was a cold rain shower to bring her back to her senses. A clear head was needed for the one thing left to do: to find Do-Yun, the unexpected friend who emerged from an unexpected situation. With confidence, she went to ask about him from a group of soldiers keeping close together at the entrance of a tent. Hearing her request, they gave each other knowing looks but directed her further down the alley.

Men and their ridiculous thoughts, Soo-Ah dared to make an assumption, gathering her cloak around her.

Do-Yun was having his lunch with some comrades, under an awning, vociferating and laughing alongside the others with his mouth full. When he saw her approaching, he wiped his mouth and left his seat, spitting insults at those who patted his back mockingly and dared to make jokes about him and Soo-Ah. To spare her and himself unwanted attention, he took her to a more private spot; the place that had been her tent while staying at Sung-Ho's camp.

"I heard you decided to leave for the capital. Your family must be waiting." He said as soon as he drew the curtain behind them.

Soo-Ah nodded, abstaining from explaining how her departure came to fruition. "No family left for me, I am afraid. Nor have I ever seen the capital city. I am to stay with the Ho family though." Her heart sank remembering how Sung-Ho must have a consort waiting for him at home. A woman, whose soft and warm arms ached for him to return to her. Hers would ache the same waiting for him.

"Oh, in our general's house? I see," said Do-Yun with some disappointment. "Well, I am from the capital so I guess we could find each other once I am back. If you would want to see me anyway. We are friends after all… Comrades in arms… War buddies… Grr." He growled as a joke before laughing and looking silly in such a way that made Soo-Ah laugh as well. "Aha… I knew you had it in you to laugh."

"Only for the right people," teased Soo-Ah, leaving Do-Yun to feel a little embarrassed. "I wanted to thank you. We had some differences on the road but you behaved without reproach and proved yourself to be an honest person. I am lucky to have met someone like you. Allow me to extend my hand in friendship. Perhaps we will see each other again. Until then, please be safe."

"Stay safe, Lady Soo-Ah. And stay away from sharp objects, like swords. They have a spell on you and make you do crazy things."

Soo-Ah grinned widely, a playful light dancing in her eyes. "You mean sharp objects like this?" She took down from her waist the kodachi the general gifted her and presented it proudly.

Do-Yun's expression turned to awe. He came to inspect it closely. "This is some fine craftsmanship. I have an eye for these things," he said with admiration, as he swung and tested the blade in the air. "It even looks like you. Short and sharp. And it does not seem to make you do crazy things. Yet. When in danger, use it well."

"Let's hope I won't have to. The general reassured me Commander Jung-In has good skills. I am leaving with him, you see."

Do-Yun's eyebrows went up. "You are going on the road with that bonehead? Sheesh! Yeah, you will be fine if he is quick enough to take his head out of his ass in time to find his sword." Then he realized he might have been too outspoken. "Forgive my language. At least he will set on the road knowing you are a woman and not a man. There will be no nasty reactions from him."

"Oh, he's known what I am for a long time. We were very close when we were children. We grew up together," she said, taking her dagger and pinning it back on her waist.

Do-Yun looked a little stunned. "I guess there is a long line to get to you." He started laughing earnestly.

Soo-Ah eyed him inquisitively as she did not understand exactly what he was saying but smiled, nonetheless.

"Well, let us shake hands like real comrades then," came Do-Yun's suggestion, accompanied by a wide smile.

They shook hands, as soldiers would. Do-Yun exaggerated, shaking her hand a little too hard and making her laugh once more.

"Fair well, Do-Yun."

"Tread ahead with honor, 'comrade' Soo-Ah," he saluted her.

She parted from him heading for the stables. This time she walked among all those men she feared, but that feeling seemed to evaporate. Taking a chance and getting to know a stranger shook her resolve to consider all men as a danger. Of course, it was luck that the stranger had not been a danger himself.

*

When noon came Soo-Ah and Jung-In took to their horses which were hunched under their travel loads and rode out of the encampment with General Sung-Ho watching until their silhouettes faded in the distance.

Now it was time for him to get back to work. And work he did – he threw himself at it until night-time came when he again had that kind of dream.

The one unleashing his primal instincts and wasting his Qi. Soo-Ah was on top of him moving up and down on his staff, making him go wild. Making him say "Harder, do it harder!" until he could no longer contain himself and came to grope her forms, calling her name. "Soo-Ah! " It jolted him out of his dream, her name still on his lips but he was left to grab the thin air because Soo-Ah was not there. He felt that monster inside of him coming to life again, hungrier than ever. He had to release the tension. Somehow. He would have a girl brought to him, maybe it would be of help.

The next day he called for one of the matrons and asked if she had someone resembling the young woman they took care of some days ago. The old woman smiled knowingly and sent him a girl of Soo-Ah's stature and build.

Sung-Ho allowed himself to go wild with the kisaeng, pounding her mercilessly, smothering her with kisses, and gripping at her flesh like he was possessed. He chased a hunger that was too sweet to ignore because while he would close his eyes, he imagined a familiar stare was there to linger on him. He did not hesitate to call her name: Soo-Ah.

The strumpet was accustomed to having her clients calling her differently, but the way the general was saying that strange name was different. It had the ring of losing, finding, and losing again. There was a deeper meaning underneath his passionate gestures.

After he took pleasure from the woman, he launched at her lips with a lust he never felt before. He was kissing the woman deeply, sucking and licking the tip of her tongue while whispering when he could, "My flower". In the end, he fell into a deep sleep, having the girl cuddle his head on her chest.

When he woke up, he felt guilty, and his thirst was still there. This was the kind of thirst that could only be quenched with a special kind of "water."

*

Thinking about it, noon was not the best time to start a journey. Soo-Ah and Jung-In had the sun shining mercilessly over their heads and not a lot of daylight left to cover the distance. But the general was in a rush, so the voyage was prepared on such short notice. Jung-In estimated that by nightfall they will be in an area where they could take shelter.

After some time spent talking about past shared experiences, like the Old Master or their life on the farm, Soo-Ah and Jung-In became more comfortable in each other's presence.

"I cannot believe you had to pretend to be a boy for so long, and that you succeeded. Admit it. You used me as your inspiration. Ha-ha!" Jung-In seemed to have kept his honest way of speaking about what he was thinking. And his earnest laugh.

"I did it. I got to train like a soldier also. You should see me with a sword. I heard you're good also, but I think you are more of a sidekick than a hero," and she peered at him, simpering. Teasing him was like pouring oil on a stuck mechanism.

"By the gods! Did you just call me a sidekick?" Jung-In stopped his horse, his mouth theatrically opened, looking both amused and challenged.

Soo-Ah turned to face him with a satisfied smile for having incensed him with such a tiny remark. "Don't tell me your ego is more dangerous than your sword?"

"Oh, I am going to show you how dangerous my sword can be," and Jung-In slid from his saddle effortlessly, coming closer to her, acting cocky and daring "Come on! Get down from that horse."

"What are you trying to do?" asked Soo-Ah, watching him perplexed.

"Well, you questioned my skills. So, I will show you my answer. Down you go." He put his big hands on the woman's waist to help her dismount her mare, leaving Soo-Ah no choice. After, with a confident gesture, while his eyes never left hers, he unsheathed the sword from the scabbard attached to her saddle and roughly handed it to her, almost smacking her chest.

Soo-Ah unwillingly took the blade. "You must be joking. How about our trip? We don't have time for such nonsense."

"Nonsense she calls them now, after putting into question my talents," Jung-In added, pretending to be offended. He brought his hands to protect his eyes while looking after the sun and concluded they had a few moments to spare sidetracking from their journey. With his vision a little blotched he came closer, to grin at her. "We have enough time."

After taking the horses out of the road and tying them to a branch nearby, he grabbed his blade.