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Lord of the Excrement

Lord of the Excrement

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be in control? To be invincible? To be cool? Have you ever wished you could talk to your crush? Yeah, me too. And this novel will not help you at all. If you’re divorced however... This still won’t help you. Anyways, Raphael is a cool dude. Sorry. A REALLY COOL dude. He has a COOL party trick too. However, one day he woke up to the coolest, greatest and most OP gift. Was he going to use it? I’ll use what little life-savings I have left due to my crippling gambling addiction to bet that he will. /-//-//-//-//-//-//-//-//-//-//-//-//-//-//-//-//-//-//-//-//-/ Yeah. Uh. Dad Joke here. Just get some stuff out of the way: Don’t expect anything great. Don’t expect regular updates. I will not lock the chapters (unless I am forced, if that is even possible). MC will not reveal his ‘gift’ to anyone, so anyone that’s reading chapter 2 can rest assured. Feel free to give constructive criticism. No I do not have a “thing” for poop and all that. I just think it’s pretty funny (c’mon, it is kinda funny. Even just a lil bit). If poop and vomit makes you, well, poop and vomit, then read this in the toilet or not at all. If you don’t have anything helpful to say, don’t bother saying it because I won’t reply nor will care. This story will be kinda....Weird. This is my first story, it is literally just for fun, and the memes. I also have no idea what I’m doing. Yup. That’s pretty much it, I guess. Enjoy(?) Peace and stay safe, Dad Joke.

MasterOfTheDadJoke · Magical Realism
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