clumsy mass murderer

Clumsy Beast, Keep Your Paws Off

Su Qinglan sat cross-legged on the grass, holding the chubbiest tiger cub she’d ever seen. “Aww… Look at you,” she whispered, booping its tiny nose. “So cute I could eat you up...” A sudden shadow loomed over her. “What’s so good about this stinky cub?” a deep, amused voice asked. She blinked up… and froze. Towering above her was a tall tiger beast man, his golden eyes narrowed in a lazy, predatory smile. “Let’s have ours,” he said. Su Qinglan’s brain short-circuited. … Ours? OURS?! Before she could process, in the next moment she was hoisted up onto his broad shoulder like a sack of grain and carried straight toward the cave. Su Qinglan was so choked by the suddenness of it all… she forgot to even complain. *** Su Qinglan’s knees knocked together as she stared up at the enormous serpent. Its cold, red eyes narrowed, the flick of its tongue tasting the air between them. “D-Don’t eat me,” she stammered, hugging herself. “I...I’m not tasty… really, I’m stringy and full of… uh… bad cholesterol.” The snake’s head lowered until it was mere inches from her face. Her fox ears twitched wildly. And then, before she could blink...its massive body shimmered, scales turning into bronzed skin and lean muscle. Standing before her was a man so breathtakingly handsome that Su Qinglan’s poor fox eyes watered just looking at him. Su Qinglan swallowed hard, her tail fluffing up in panic. “I… I…” Her voice cracked. Okay, new problem… the snake is hot. She squeezed her eyes shut. “If you… if you really want…” She blurted, her face burning, “…y-you can… take me.” *** One moment Su Qinglan was fighting with the zombie king with all her might. Boom! The next, she woke up in a bizarre beast world… inside the body of a lazy, pampered, fat local tyrant everyone hated. The “original” Su Qinglan had been an arrogant, scheming villainess who spent her days bullying weaker beast women, chasing after handsome males, and terrorizing the tribe kids. Now, thanks to fate’s twisted sense of humor, Qinglan had inherited the body and the bad reputation. But honestly? Being fat in a beast world was still better than starving in the apocalypse. At least here, she could eat. The only problem? In this world, men weren’t just men, they were beastmen. Tall, strong, dangerous… And apparently, every beast woman was expected to have several husbands. The catch? The “original” Qinglan’s antics had scared away every decent male within a ten-mile radius. Armed with her apocalyptic survival instincts, a sharp tongue, and a mysterious system that suddenly activated... "Binding with host…" "Congratulations, host, for successfully arriving in the beast world." Qinglan decided she wasn’t going to cry about fate. If she had to live here, then she’d live big, literally.

Violet_Melody99 · Fantasy

CEO's Clumsy Secret Wife

The Billionaire and the Spy: A Love Story (Sort Of) Meet Henry, a billionaire CEO who's got everything—except a clue. Enter Alison, the corporate spy with a PhD in pretending to trip over her own feet while plotting world domination (or at least Henry's downfall). She’s here to steal secrets, but oops... she might also be stealing his heart (ugh, feelings!). Will Henry figure out he's dating his biggest enemy, or will Alison’s clumsiness win the day? In this laugh-out-loud, dangerously charming romance, love is the ultimate hostile takeover—and trust is just a corporate myth.

Yanie_Long · Fantasy

Limitless Evolution: My Body Is a Weapon of Mass Destruction

[STATUS: DISCONTINUED / DROPPED] Note: This story is no longer being updated. I am leaving it up for archival purposes.

Red_Marsh · Fantasy

Clumsy Eight-Tailed Fox with Her Fourth Husband

Marriage means different things to different people. For Thalia Kim, it means survival. Five years ago, she died on her wedding night. Not in a dramatic, metaphorical way, but quite literally, with a broken bottle driven straight into her heart. She had only been doing what she always did. Men could never fully handle her, and they rarely stayed conscious after. So when her third husband went still, she assumed he had fainted, just like the others. He hadn’t. He opened his eyes, saw something he shouldn’t have, and panicked. Before her power could take effect, everything went wrong. That was how she lost her first tail. Now she only has eight left, and worse, her core is already starting to break. If it collapses completely, even a year would be considered lucky. So yes, she needs to get married again—not for love, not for happiness, but simply to stay alive long enough to become human. The plan is simple: find someone, get married, survive. It would have worked. If she hadn’t proposed to William Carter. A man her sister is clearly afraid of. A man who does not look like someone she can control. And more importantly, a man who should have refused without a second thought. But he didn’t. He said yes! Just like that, without hesitation, without question, as if the decision had already been made long before she even asked. Now, things are already starting to go wrong. Her ability doesn’t work on him. She doesn’t know what he wants. And he doesn’t seem like the kind of man who makes careless decisions. Which leaves her with one very inconvenient problem... This marriage might keep her alive. Or it might end exactly the way her last one did.

fyaya · Urban

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