funny things kids say stories

My Boy Finally Say Yes to Me

At age 3, she knew who she wanted to marry. At age 10, she gave away her first kiss. At age 20, she became his personal bodyguard. For her childhood best friend to still run away after all this, what was the point of her learning marital art all these years? The saddest thing to come out of all this was the fact that she was the one feeling burdened all this time… Five years later. “Mommy! How come I am so cute but I do not have a daddy?” “How should I know? Go ask your daddy!” Xia Yuxun watched the newly married couple through the TV screen and answered without looking back. Half an hour later, at the live wedding that was being broadcasted, a crying child was grabbing onto the groom’s leg and screaming “daddy”. The man stared at the miniature version of himself and asked, “Where’s your mommy?” Xia Yuxun, who was watching this live show gulped, “You brat, you are digging your mom a hole!”

Jiong Jiong You Yao · Urban

I Can See Through All Things' Information

Reborn into the body of a poor young boy in an unknown village in another world, Lu Qing felt quite helpless. Fortunately, he awakened an ability to see through the information of objects, which gave him a bit of capital to survive. He looked at a weed by the road. [Cow bone grass, average quality, medicinal, highly effective in treating bone injuries.] He looked at a red carp in the river. [Red moon carp, excellent quality, delicious meat, a top-grade nourishing food.] He looked at a wild rabbit in the mountains. [Gray rabbit, ordinary wild rabbit, edible.] ... With his innate ability, Lu Qing gradually established himself in the village, able to survive. Just when he thought he would lead a peaceful life in this ancient world with low productivity, one day, he suddenly saw a figure sweeping across the sky...

King of Salted Fish · Eastern

Cultivation: When you take things to the extreme

Having crossed into the Immortal Cultivation World and finding himself at the very bottom, struggling to survive, Xu Yang discovered he possessed a special golden finger. As long as he persisted in any single activity, he could gain the power to transform the decayed into the miraculous. Eating: Stabilize the Foundation and Cultivate Essence, strengthen the body, extend lifespan… Sleeping: Nourish and accumulate energy, be as vigorous as a dragon or a tiger, Eternal Youth… Breathing: Turtle breathing technique, a tide of vitality, Qi Moves Mountains and Rivers… Walking: Travel a thousand miles in a day, shrink the land beneath you, rival mountains in your speed… No matter if it was the common myriad activities or the Hundred Arts of Cultivation, as long as one was persistent, they could reach the pinnacle of refinement. With this, Xu Yang evolved from a humble fisherman into the strongest ever known, revered as the Ten Mile Sword God!

Forget to wear a vest · Eastern

I'll Add Points To All Things

Su Yang was an average university student in Shanghai when he received a system that allowed him to add points to things. The point system provided him with missions and by clearing them, he would gain points. Add a point into an object, the object will receive a special ability; add a point into a plant, the plant will come alive; add points on himself, he will get talents or superpowers. With the mysterious point system in hand, Su Yang aimed to become rich and alter his fate. On his path towards success, he encountered many interesting matters and people, including famous actresses and business tycoons. Fueled by determination, Su Yang set his sight on adding points into all things to help him achieve his goal.

Endless World · Urban

Can We Say No to Divorce?

Bei Ran lay on the operating table, Gu Qingchen was her surgeon. His eyes, deep as the Aegean Sea, gazed at her: "Honey, it's been four years since we got married, and you're still afraid of me?" Honey? Last night he already threw a divorce agreement at her, what right does he have to call her that? In City A, Gu Qingchen is a long-lasting legend. He is a leading figure in the medical field and a major shareholder in a Fortune 500 company, capable of great influence in the business world. He only needed an obedient wife. Bei Ran was so 'obedient' that he never had to worry. The four-year marriage was just a matter of agreement, but who is the one lingering endlessly after the divorce? She accidentally fell into water at a wedding she was hosting, he said: "Beg me, you know I'm always responsive to your demands!" "Gu Qingchen, we're divorced!" Bei Ran couldn't stand it anymore! He laughed coldly: "Bei Ran, we've been married for four years, you have a five-year-old daughter, do you really want to die here?" Bei Ran was shocked, he knew? Would he fight her for her daughter? Gu Qingchen could never have imagined that the chubby little bun in front of him was actually his biological daughter! "Bei Ran, you hid it from me for five years, always flawlessly obedient before me, tell me, how should I punish you?" Gu Qingchen raised a bloodthirsty smile. Could she possibly not tell him there is also a son who looks just like him! Theater Version: The teacher informed Bei Ran that her son had used a scalpel in school to investigate the cause of death of poisoned small animals. Her daughter was causing a stir in school with her stock trading. In her anger, she said, "No one to take you to school today, take the bus yourselves." The daughter sought help from Gu Qingchen but got no response, so she said: "Yesterday, a pretty aunt stayed in Dad's office for an hour, and her skirt was super short." The twins truly had a shared understanding; the son said: "The station manager hugged Mom yesterday, even kissed her cheek, and said he would never let go!" Bei Ran and Gu Qingchen spoke in unison: "Trying to sow discord, you're still too naive, go to school yourselves!" The siblings shouldered their backpacks and went to take the bus, while the couple returned to the bedroom, closing the door behind them. She leapt onto him, her fiery temper on full display: "You actually stayed with that woman for an entire hour?" He was overbearingly domineering: "Damn it, which part of you did he kiss, I will seal his mouth with a scalpel!"

Lazy Color · Urban

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Unrequited love for the starlight, forming a river

When they heard that the Ten Palace Masters had found a living person to fall in love with, a circle of little ghosts gathered in the underworld to look at the Tongshi Mirror. "This is the man that Boss has taken a fancy to. His appearance is not inferior to that of the immortals in the heavens." "The Tenth Highness 'eyes are truly poisonous." "But this is a living person, right? Your Highness is really ruthless to yourself." "Are you stupid? This is His Highness!" The dignified Ten Palace Masters did not approve the official documents and did not judge the case. Instead, they ran to the human world to chase after stars. They even became stars themselves and accidentally became famous. From then on, she became a female celebrity during the day and a fan at night. When she had nothing to do, she would even personally catch a malicious ghost. Until one day, he was discovered by the wall…

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Did Imperial Uncle admit his mistake today?

Ten years after ten years, the Imperial Concubine endured until all the villains went offline, only to be told that Little Imperial Uncle was going to inherit the throne and even confer her the title of Empress? No! No! The position of empress was not a good one. With the empress dowager suppressing her and the favored concubines running away from her, she could not even guarantee her own life. Her ambition was simple. She wanted to retire early and become a leisurely empress dowager. After all, her son had the right to inherit the throne. However…was Little Imperial Uncle such an easy person to negotiate with? He wanted the country and the beauties. The book was connected to the previous one,"Valley Master Doesn't Follow the Pattern."

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The Daily Life of a Salted Fish Immortal Cultivator

This was a world led by cultivators. The status of cultivators was superior to that of mortals. However, it was unknown when it started, but the strong preyed on the weak in the cultivation world, and killing and stealing treasures became a common occurrence. People only saw the endless scenery on the Immortal Road, but they did not notice that the bones on the roadside had already piled up into mountains. Who told you that this is the daily life of a cultivator? Could it be that being like this all the time was right? Li Anran saw this clearly. After reaching the sixth level of Qi Refinement, he did not choose to live as an inner sect disciple with better treatment. Instead, he turned into an unpopular outer sect disciple and returned to this brightly lit mortal world. " Longevity is like floating clouds to me. I cultivate to protect those who can't cultivate, and even more so to protect my loved ones. So please remember, don't provoke me." Li Anran held the most advanced magical equipment in his hand and led a group of disciples to issue a warning to the entire cultivation world.

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I'm just a small screenwriter

I'm just a small screenwriter. I won't allow anyone to ruin my script. But the script that I wrote, you guys can't shoot it well, you guys can't act it well, and the theme song isn't good either… Therefore, I can only do it myself.

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After the engagement was broken off, the whole world wanted to chase her

[New article, Live streaming coffins for sale! I earn merit to extend my life "] Su Mei's soul disappeared for three years, and was trampled by family, friendship, and love. When everyone despised her, she returned. "This is what seduction is," she said to the cold and gloomy narcissist as she blocked him at the bathroom door."Do you understand?" However, he did not expect this day to come. "A bastard dares to dream of climbing up the social ladder?" "Why don't you take a look at yourself!" "The Su family is really unlucky to have such a money-losing thing." "It's fine if she's ugly, but she still dared to seduce President Li of the First Group after the engagement was broken off." Suddenly, there was a commotion, and the news headlines exploded: "She's mine @ Su Mei" What was Second Uncle doing? [What are you looking at? I'm just declaring my sovereignty.] [Tsundere Wolfdog Second Uncle VS Sea Girl Little Wild Cat] [Second Uncle's famous saying: 'You want to find me? Tonight will do."

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