anakin and padme love story fanfiction

It's good so far. But couldn't you have just written all the gifts the MC got from the ROB in one chapter? Btw who is gonna be part of the mc's harem? I hope Padme is one. I know she is supposed to be Anakin's wife in the future and I like Anakin he's one of my favourite characters in star wars. But Padme's ending kinda sucked. Dying at the hands of Anakin so yeah please add her to the harem!?!?

I really like where this is going, I know this is going to sound really insane but I imagine Atriox ntr Anakin with Padme, I don't know why I thought that

This story has a lot of potential. IT’s hard finding good Anakin centered stories in fanfiction and Webnovel. I look forward to when the story starts opening up.

This is just overall a good idea with terrible execution i can understand some of the decisions but other just fall flat. One of the main issues i take from this is the seemingly the mc proclivity to change everything he is on a dime he went from smart kid doing well on a test and flirting with padme to suddenly making dna targeting superweapons because he decided he wanted to end all war. Then he suddenly gets told by padme she is in love with him then abandons all plans and ideas on a whim this is just a bad combo of trying to be compelling romance but fails terribly, I can understand making qui gon put anakin in the pod race anyway because jedi can be asses about the force and panaka not wanting to use untested tech but where was the sense in just hiding there marriage in politics anakin hid his because he was a jedi the mc has no such issue I think you should take some time to learn pacing character development and interaction and story structure about how one decision can affect other thing also just use a mad scientist system the whole rick son plot just fell flat.

while the writing is above average for fanfiction the overall plot doesn't make much sense, with characters making choices that are beyond shortsighted and often straight up negligent once or twice a chapter. for a couple examples: 1) why isn't axel immediately taken into the Jedi order? he's 3 years old, as powerful as Anakin and has no attachments. he is literally the holy grail of Jedi padawans, and yet they place more attention on Anakin, what? 2) why do they take axel back to naboo? he's 3 literally every other option is better than todler in a war zone. I know it's just so the author can follow the plot but if you're changing nothing about cannon there's no reason to be there. 3) why isn't Padme at the Senate to spectator Palpatine and everything else? she literally worships buerocracy but instead decides to spend her time with a 3 year old? no. so yeah writings totally fine, but you really need to assess why characters make the choices they make.