webnovel
lsax
lsaxLv16mth
2024-09-26 19:27

Overall it being your first work is understandable. The Little bits of Information before the start of the chapter was Good touch as it allowed us readers to understand it a little bit. But the chapter seemed to be a little bit to short and overall the tone was a bit rushed and just the atmosphere was little different with the characters reactions being bit bland and not expressed to well, but overall it decent for a new author, Welcome to World of Web-Novels!

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King_Of_Choas
King_Of_ChoasAuthor

Thanks for your feedback i will try to improve it as the chapters go on

lsax
lsaxLv1

Last thing, You put to much time-skips like (5) years later and at the end (3) Years later, you should only reserve that for like training arcs or something related or similar to those.

King_Of_Choas:Thanks for your feedback i will try to improve it as the chapters go on
King_Of_Choas
King_Of_ChoasAuthor

okk thanks

lsax:Last thing, You put to much time-skips like (5) years later and at the end (3) Years later, you should only reserve that for like training arcs or something related or similar to those.
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