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GoliasLv55mth
2024-09-13 20:02

To be fair, it's much better than the previous twilight fanfic, so at least I see individual personalities, the negatives, in my opinion, are the fact that the mc isn't a reincarnation and his system is clear as day due to Edward's mind reading. In terms of development, it's mixed, I like how the plot went, but I can't see the complete veracity of it, if there are other supernatural beings, the MC system itself makes him supernatural, turning him into a vampire then becomes optional, Another point is the family reaction, especially Edward and Rosalie, Edward has a very strong attachment to the soul and believes that vampires don't have it, even if the MC isn't Bela, Edward should at least be much more irritated by the situation and not be giggling due to the mc's mental comments, Rosalie also hates being a vampire, but she is not a bad person by nature, she only got that way with Bela because she was the opposite of Jack, wanting to be a vampire, Carlisle despite appearing calm and gentle as in the original, he took the situation very lightly too, anyway... there was a great improvement in the development of the characters but there are still some parts like these that make us doubt. That said, leaving aside what seems real or not and the negative points, I enjoyed the story, letting Edward read Mc's mind would irritate me if he was a reincarnator, but he isn't and he doesn't have much to hide, the system doesn't matter much to me either, after all this is a world where there isn't an unbalanced scale of power (at least not until the author adds it), so the system isn't really very important in my opinion, it's funny how the fact of things which would normally irritate me cancel themselves out, but anyway... I like the general direction of the story and if I ignore the personality changes fooling me by saying it's an AU, I can read it calmly. The only real negative point so far is the size of the chapters, on the one hand there are daily releases, on the other hand, the chapters are very short and I need to wait three or four to get a quality read, other than that, it's a great story so far, please continue.

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