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Eternal_Dragon_God
Eternal_Dragon_GodLv45mth
2024-10-04 04:47

from what i understand, the author is not an experienced writer. The story could have been better if author tried to understand other's opinion about his work. The bg was nice initially but author forced to much bs. I suggest that author should take some break and rewrite the story and remove plotholes and bs from start

New Life in the World of Magic

Clean_Wizard
Not enough ratings
19 Chs

Liked by 1 people

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Replies1
Eternal_Dragon_God
Eternal_Dragon_GodLv4

before u say i didn't read too many chapters, i have read so many chinese bs these days that i cannot bring myself to read another bs story. sorry author

5mth
Other Reviews
ENRYU999
ENRYU999Lv15

A really good start,just a question, is it an original or a translation ?

7mth

abc_logan
abc_loganLv14

excellent start but 2/ week is so slow but i like it

6mth
Avirup_Das
Avirup_DasLv4

I like the start. The mc seems to be slightly bookish and soft spoken. But thats a good thing i feel. I jst think that when u started u implied the mc had been a person who came to terms with his solitude after he started reading books. Just my opinion, but maybe try to add some relations and bonds slowly, as that will root him in this reality than thinking about the world as a book, while also adding depth to the story. Also (my opinion again) please dont make the Mc super powerful and be able to do stuff that grown wizards cant do by the time he is halfway into his first year. Doesn't make sense and breaks the immersion totally. Maybe because of his love for books and all he will be rsther erudite and a bit ahead of the curve, like some spells of one year in advance. Not too much. Potions are severely underratted so you can maybe make the mc explore that or other magical fields( that amkes sense). please dont make the mc master alchemy and runes by the time he is first year. As j said before, it doesn't make sense and breaks immersion. And lastly, just my opinion again, based on the vibe the mc gave, he seemed kind hearted. Please dont change that. Too many fics for some reason make Dumbledore into some villan and there is a growing trend of making villan mc, who will do anything, no proper relationships or motives that explain his drive except that they look at the world as if its a game, and do random stuff, sometimes evil. Without proper buildup showing all that, breaks immersion and seems dumb (just my opinion). In any case all the best for your story. Its not easy to create something, and i eidh you success in your endeavors.

5mth
Sami_Alfoheday
Sami_AlfohedayLv14

good start so far hope you have some original ideas because if it's gonna be like regular harrypotter fanfic I will be boring

6mth
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