belladooLv36mth

2024-06-21 20:38

The main ideas of the plot are quite promising and the FMC seems interesting so far. The pace of plot progression is also good despite only 12 chapters currently available; I feel like quite a lot has happened already, but not in an overwhelming way. In terms of improvements: - Much more attention is needed when proofreading and editing. There are frequent spelling and grammar mistakes that take away from the quality of the story. Grammarly or chatGPT can help a lot! - If the step family will continue to be antagonists for the FMC, they’d benefit from a bit more fleshing out so that they’re not just cardboard characters. Things to consider: reasons for the rivalry between the twins, more on how step mum met FMC’s father, whether the normal servants are treated as badly as FMC, etc.

THE RETURN OF THE LUNA HEIRESS

Eden_Writes

3.8

64 Chs