Excellent story worth a shot. Complete english sentences with paragraphes, good writing style and rare typos. For an ukrainian who might not even be a native english speaker, it’s quite an achievment. The first chapters have more descriptions and inner monologues because it’s a dungeon story, but it soon switch to a better balance with actions and dialogues. Good world building, and great attention from the author to build a consistant magic system bringing enougth originality to stand out compared to generic magic fantasy stories. It’s called ”The origin of dungeons” and explores how such a world came to be. It’s therefor a bit weird how there are some inconsistancies or even contradictions between the actions and the established personality of the MC. It tickles me a bit, but you guys will probably overlook it just fine. I do warn the author that a too apathic MC that turns into just a camera for the readers makes for a boring story tho. An MC needs motivations, drive and agency, else the author will have to cheat too much and pile up the plot armor and coincidencies to push the story forward, turning the MC into a raft without sail pushed and dragged around by the tempest. Overall a great start and i recommend you give it a try.
Liked it!
LIKENo replies. Be the first!