Review Detail of HaracasAye in Vile Dominion
Review detail
Dissapointing. Mc is not a villain. He has feelings for his family and clan, going out if his way to ensure their safety. He doesnt have a goal and is blindly walking the path of cultivation. The world seems to revolve around the mc. His allies are people with the potential to reach the peak of the world and this is just in the first vol. The plot of vol 1 is also kinda confusing. The mc goes from a newbie, reluctant to kill person to genius level schemer by the end and we dont even see how or why.
Vile Dominion
Auth0r
Liked by 5 people
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Thank you for your review. The point is, I am still working on the character development. A character who suddenly appeared in another world won't have a goal immediately especially when their mindset is different. I am trying to provide him a particular goal through his own experience. Through his journey, MC would realize his own goal. Currently, he is suppressing his emotions. When he truly understand it, he would become something different and something even greater. Weakness is something every character has. You can't avoid it. Villain doesn't mean no weakness. This novel is still in it's initial phase. I am still working on how to make it more enjoyable while also relating it with real world and not let it be plot carried.
Your explanation would be believable if the mc didnt already live 10+ years in the world. That is more than enough time to get used to the nature of the world. Also if you wanted mc to have character development maybe making him a 40+ year old reincanator wasnt a good idea. Thats a middle aged man. Thats your father. Tell me can your father go through character development? Someone like that shud already have an established personality and character.
Auth0r:Thank you for your review. The point is, I am still working on the character development. A character who suddenly appeared in another world won't have a goal immediately especially when their mindset is different. I am trying to provide him a particular goal through his own experience. Through his journey, MC would realize his own goal. Currently, he is suppressing his emotions. When he truly understand it, he would become something different and something even greater. Weakness is something every character has. You can't avoid it. Villain doesn't mean no weakness. This novel is still in it's initial phase. I am still working on how to make it more enjoyable while also relating it with real world and not let it be plot carried.
I think I mentioned him to be around 30 years old not 40+. I mentioned earlier too, this is just initial phase of the novel. I have yet to give his backstory later about his previous life. In that you can understand why he needs Character development and why he doesn't have any goal. In fact, in the vol2 itself I am about to give him a goal, but his backstory will wait. His 10+ years in this world were only theoretical experience, not a life and death experience. Real life experience is much more complicated than just having theoretical knowledge. I think you have skipped some para. I have clearly explained these points. Let's just say you lived in a world full of security without any crimes (let's just say no crime even though there are many), and you suddenly enter another world. No matter how much you adapt yourself mentally, when you see the cruelty for the first time, you would still be shocked. You will always be reluctant to kill someone for the first time. He needed these experience, I can't make him overpowered from the first chapter or it would be too boring.
HaracasAye:Your explanation would be believable if the mc didnt already live 10+ years in the world. That is more than enough time to get used to the nature of the world. Also if you wanted mc to have character development maybe making him a 40+ year old reincanator wasnt a good idea. Thats a middle aged man. Thats your father. Tell me can your father go through character development? Someone like that shud already have an established personality and character.
I have replied to all of your comments in other chapters too, you can check it out. Any constructive criticism is welcome. I would take these points in my mind and try to improve in further chapters.
HaracasAye:Your explanation would be believable if the mc didnt already live 10+ years in the world. That is more than enough time to get used to the nature of the world. Also if you wanted mc to have character development maybe making him a 40+ year old reincanator wasnt a good idea. Thats a middle aged man. Thats your father. Tell me can your father go through character development? Someone like that shud already have an established personality and character.
All the issues I have with the novel author can be summed up in one statement. Keep your characters consistent. You treat the mc like a child in some cases and an adult in others. If he was a child I agree, he shud be hesitant about killing, not yet have a goal and require character development. But he is an adult whose lived in the world for 10 years.
Auth0r:I think I mentioned him to be around 30 years old not 40+. I mentioned earlier too, this is just initial phase of the novel. I have yet to give his backstory later about his previous life. In that you can understand why he needs Character development and why he doesn't have any goal. In fact, in the vol2 itself I am about to give him a goal, but his backstory will wait. His 10+ years in this world were only theoretical experience, not a life and death experience. Real life experience is much more complicated than just having theoretical knowledge. I think you have skipped some para. I have clearly explained these points. Let's just say you lived in a world full of security without any crimes (let's just say no crime even though there are many), and you suddenly enter another world. No matter how much you adapt yourself mentally, when you see the cruelty for the first time, you would still be shocked. You will always be reluctant to kill someone for the first time. He needed these experience, I can't make him overpowered from the first chapter or it would be too boring.
I get your point. I just wanted to depict that practical experience was more important, but it seems I have messed up in doing so. I will try to improve and not make such mistakes.
HaracasAye:All the issues I have with the novel author can be summed up in one statement. Keep your characters consistent. You treat the mc like a child in some cases and an adult in others. If he was a child I agree, he shud be hesitant about killing, not yet have a goal and require character development. But he is an adult whose lived in the world for 10 years.
I hope you can stick to the novel. Most of the readers just read and leave. There are rarely those who give their suggestions.
HaracasAye:All the issues I have with the novel author can be summed up in one statement. Keep your characters consistent. You treat the mc like a child in some cases and an adult in others. If he was a child I agree, he shud be hesitant about killing, not yet have a goal and require character development. But he is an adult whose lived in the world for 10 years.
By the way, why do you think this novel was disappointing? Just because he had feelings for his family? I mean every novel had MCs who have feelings for their family. They all have weaknesses.
HaracasAye:All the issues I have with the novel author can be summed up in one statement. Keep your characters consistent. You treat the mc like a child in some cases and an adult in others. If he was a child I agree, he shud be hesitant about killing, not yet have a goal and require character development. But he is an adult whose lived in the world for 10 years.
Its dissapointing for all the reasons ive stated. Having feelings for family is a part of it. I find the whole concept of a person with a family in past life taking new parents and siblings unbelievable. Imagine if one day you find urself living amongst strangers, can you call them mother, father and brother even if they treat you well? Author there are an infinite number of weaknesses one can have they dont have to be so predictable. Weakness of family and killing, are the most cliche ones used for heroic mcs.
Auth0r:By the way, why do you think this novel was disappointing? Just because he had feelings for his family? I mean every novel had MCs who have feelings for their family. They all have weaknesses.
The reason he has all those feelings is because there is a character development. Initially he was from modern world, and any modern world human would have feelings. The reality is, if you stay with anyone, even strangers, over a span of 10 years, you would gradually develop feelings for them. This is something I learnt from my own experiences. I wanted the story to be as realistic as possible, even if it is in unrealistic world. I want him to grow up slowly with experience. I would take your suggestion in my account.
HaracasAye:Its dissapointing for all the reasons ive stated. Having feelings for family is a part of it. I find the whole concept of a person with a family in past life taking new parents and siblings unbelievable. Imagine if one day you find urself living amongst strangers, can you call them mother, father and brother even if they treat you well? Author there are an infinite number of weaknesses one can have they dont have to be so predictable. Weakness of family and killing, are the most cliche ones used for heroic mcs.
Auth0r:The reason he has all those feelings is because there is a character development. Initially he was from modern world, and any modern world human would have feelings. The reality is, if you stay with anyone, even strangers, over a span of 10 years, you would gradually develop feelings for them. This is something I learnt from my own experiences. I wanted the story to be as realistic as possible, even if it is in unrealistic world. I want him to grow up slowly with experience. I would take your suggestion in my account.
I am not on discord, so I can't join. Never mind I just wanted to know the opinion. I will try to improve. It was my first work. So, I know I would make mistake. I just hope you stick to it longer.
HaracasAye:Join the discord server in my bio if you want to discuss more. Its difficult on here.
HaracasAye:Join the discord server in my bio if you want to discuss more. Its difficult on here.
MR_SYUBHIO:When I try to join, it says the link is invalid or expired. Can you create a new one?
I think something's wrong with the server links. I tried to join again, but it still didn’t work. A friend of mine tried it as well, but it still didn’t work. If you don’t mind, could you add me on Discord and send an invite link through that? It would be great. Here is my Discord username: khan_1.
HaracasAye:Done