This story is... Weird. The grammar is fine, nothing to whine about. What just... Icks me the wrong way is how easily he sells off talents, just show the scroll and an instant 'Hail shop owner, I believe!' I might've gone blank and skimmed over the part where it stated: 'Anyone who sees contents of scroll are instantly convinced of its veracity.'- Even if I skimmed once or twice for said line. The idea of selling talents is an at least 8/10 idea at least, though it lacks the 'Buying' of talents, which sort of feels like a let down too. Then, if I had to say something about the characters, they don't feel that... Believeable? Too floaty and whimsicle? It's hard to explain, but I can give an example; '>Shop opens >Kid comes over and asks about herb suppliers, like a good entrepreneur, somehow knowing where he's at a bit after he moved in >MC says no in a weird tone >Kid then offers herbs' specific phrase: 'I think these herbs would be a good addition to the products for my new shop'... Read it, read it again, think about how you'd say it yourself, and then read it again, then you'll understand- Or maybe I'm just mentally ill, totally possible. And yes, I checked, the moment you show one of the talent scrolls, someone will instantly be convinced! This baffeling writing choice is my biggest problem, this is a fic about showing scrolls with talents in them to people in exchange for their cultivation with merchantry on the side. I don't understand why he would even bother to prepare the showcase, just show a talent scroll and instantly you'd convince someone that they really give talents. Let's just say... That isn't the most interesting and... Imaginitive way to implement this whole 'Selling talent' business.
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