Review Detail of Sir_Squirrel in Mushoku Tensei: Reborn as Paul Greyrat
Review detail
honesty reading this left me so drained that I can't even form a proper review, the writing and stuff are good I'll give you that, but the characters and the mc especially are just so annoying that it makes the whole thing just meh, literally everything he does from the way he was complaining at the beginning, his thought process, actions, and the way he speaks in general, to his self-righteous nonsense that is as overbearing as the author's other character from danmachi and their similar mentality are just annoying, tbh I can't say more than this without just sounding rude or outright hostile for no reason, so am just gonna stop here and wish you all enjoy this story because i simply couldn't.
Mushoku Tensei: Reborn as Paul Greyrat
Feniurme
Liked by 4 people
LIKEReplies6
Thank you for the review. I'll be honest and say I was a bit frustrated reading this. I've been having trouble sleeping so I'm not in the best mood to receive criticism, but I really like writing and want to improve.Can you talk me through how you would go about improving my story? The most common critique of my stories are the mcs. Any advice would be appreciated.Lastly, thanks for not insulting me. Its really hard for me to be constantly called names without it going to my head. So I really appreciated that you were amicable, even if you didn't like my story.
Yeah sorry you have to deal with all that, I get that being criticised so often can drain you a lot mentally so my bad if you think I overstepped, anyway that said, tbh when it comes to your characters, mind you when I say all this am talking about my preference and am not straight up saying your characters are bad or smth it's just that I prefer, and I think many other readers do as well, Mcs who are more forward I think? I don't how to put it exactly, i don't like characters who just go with the flow and do things along the way, i think the ones that are are more self-centred are better, and I don't mean as in being more selfish, but being wilful and with a strong character, stuff like this are what deferential a good story or a good book from a hollow and pitiful copy-paste cringe story like most new isekais out there that have no substance or proper writing to be considered anything more than low-quality children book with an mc with no real soul or self will and just go about doing exactly what is expected of them, take this mc for example and compair him to an mc like naruto, paul just feels weaker and more hollow, and am not talking about physical strength, like his very soul and character just lack what makes characters like naruto shine, btw this was just an extreme example at the top of my head, my point is that paul just feels weak willed and bland, not someone who is a lead to a darkish magic medieval fantasy harem story, and the same applies to your danmachi mc, his character is basicly nonexistent at the start of the story with no hopes, dreams, goals or defining principles or codes that define him, he was just pulled by the flow of the story and he just acted accordingly his character wasn't something added or inforced on the story it was just molded by each scenario he was in like putty. (honestly, I don't know if I managed to get my point across, and am sorry if this seems like me just hating on your characters, believe me, am not, I just thought being as blunt as I can would make it easier for me to explain)
Feniurme:Thank you for the review. I'll be honest and say I was a bit frustrated reading this. I've been having trouble sleeping so I'm not in the best mood to receive criticism, but I really like writing and want to improve.Can you talk me through how you would go about improving my story? The most common critique of my stories are the mcs. Any advice would be appreciated.Lastly, thanks for not insulting me. Its really hard for me to be constantly called names without it going to my head. So I really appreciated that you were amicable, even if you didn't like my story.
I understand your point, I really do, but i really do love this FF a lot, this may be one of my few joys of the day.So if the author stopped writing somehow..... ..... I will come and hunt u down(half/jokeđ)
Sir_Squirrel:Yeah sorry you have to deal with all that, I get that being criticised so often can drain you a lot mentally so my bad if you think I overstepped, anyway that said, tbh when it comes to your characters, mind you when I say all this am talking about my preference and am not straight up saying your characters are bad or smth it's just that I prefer, and I think many other readers do as well, Mcs who are more forward I think? I don't how to put it exactly, i don't like characters who just go with the flow and do things along the way, i think the ones that are are more self-centred are better, and I don't mean as in being more selfish, but being wilful and with a strong character, stuff like this are what deferential a good story or a good book from a hollow and pitiful copy-paste cringe story like most new isekais out there that have no substance or proper writing to be considered anything more than low-quality children book with an mc with no real soul or self will and just go about doing exactly what is expected of them, take this mc for example and compair him to an mc like naruto, paul just feels weaker and more hollow, and am not talking about physical strength, like his very soul and character just lack what makes characters like naruto shine, btw this was just an extreme example at the top of my head, my point is that paul just feels weak willed and bland, not someone who is a lead to a darkish magic medieval fantasy harem story, and the same applies to your danmachi mc, his character is basicly nonexistent at the start of the story with no hopes, dreams, goals or defining principles or codes that define him, he was just pulled by the flow of the story and he just acted accordingly his character wasn't something added or inforced on the story it was just molded by each scenario he was in like putty. (honestly, I don't know if I managed to get my point across, and am sorry if this seems like me just hating on your characters, believe me, am not, I just thought being as blunt as I can would make it easier for me to explain)
I think I understand what you are saying. It's as if the MCs action are dictated by the world around him rather than being of his own volition.
Sir_Squirrel:Yeah sorry you have to deal with all that, I get that being criticised so often can drain you a lot mentally so my bad if you think I overstepped, anyway that said, tbh when it comes to your characters, mind you when I say all this am talking about my preference and am not straight up saying your characters are bad or smth it's just that I prefer, and I think many other readers do as well, Mcs who are more forward I think? I don't how to put it exactly, i don't like characters who just go with the flow and do things along the way, i think the ones that are are more self-centred are better, and I don't mean as in being more selfish, but being wilful and with a strong character, stuff like this are what deferential a good story or a good book from a hollow and pitiful copy-paste cringe story like most new isekais out there that have no substance or proper writing to be considered anything more than low-quality children book with an mc with no real soul or self will and just go about doing exactly what is expected of them, take this mc for example and compair him to an mc like naruto, paul just feels weaker and more hollow, and am not talking about physical strength, like his very soul and character just lack what makes characters like naruto shine, btw this was just an extreme example at the top of my head, my point is that paul just feels weak willed and bland, not someone who is a lead to a darkish magic medieval fantasy harem story, and the same applies to your danmachi mc, his character is basicly nonexistent at the start of the story with no hopes, dreams, goals or defining principles or codes that define him, he was just pulled by the flow of the story and he just acted accordingly his character wasn't something added or inforced on the story it was just molded by each scenario he was in like putty. (honestly, I don't know if I managed to get my point across, and am sorry if this seems like me just hating on your characters, believe me, am not, I just thought being as blunt as I can would make it easier for me to explain)
Something along those lines, the mc has nothing that really defines him but some flimsy modern morals that don't add up to where he is at, he isn't a man of great virtue and honor who lives by his own code or a selfish man with a grander view of himself and the world he found himself in, he is just an isekai protagonist that does only what is expected of an isikei protagonist to do like a bad script of a bad story.
Y0G_S0TH0TH:I think I understand what you are saying. It's as if the MCs action are dictated by the world around him rather than being of his own volition.
Feniurme:Thank you for the review. I'll be honest and say I was a bit frustrated reading this. I've been having trouble sleeping so I'm not in the best mood to receive criticism, but I really like writing and want to improve.Can you talk me through how you would go about improving my story? The most common critique of my stories are the mcs. Any advice would be appreciated.Lastly, thanks for not insulting me. Its really hard for me to be constantly called names without it going to my head. So I really appreciated that you were amicable, even if you didn't like my story.