webnovel
simon_herbert
simon_herbertLv31yr
2023-08-26 18:03

The beginning works really well and got me into reading this ff. For the most part feels like a new take on HP. But in saying that there are some glaring inconsistencies. Learning the levitation charm twice. MC getting in trouble for having a dagger focus (which really isn't that much more dangerous than a regular wand). Ravenclaw losing their seeker with a broken arm (they have magic, you need a different reason if you want your MC on the team). Ravenclaw Vs Hufflepuff match being first and also on the same day as classes. And then the next day is Griffindor vs Slytherin. Then asking if they are going to the three broom sticks (you got to set that up differently if first years can go). Dialogue since the quiditch arc needs some work as well. A lot of it unfortunately does not make sense.Overall, I've really enjoyed this FF up until the quiditch arc. I can and will forgive a lot of problems, please work on pacing if you are making changes to the timeline like you did. Set up is important. In saying all that I appreciate the entertainment you have given me with you writing it has been fun up until around the 30th chapter. I will continue reading to see if these problems continue.

Harry Potter / Highschool DxD : A deal with the devil

MeatBunKun
Not enough ratings
146 Chs

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Other Reviews
Insane_Pumpkin
Insane_PumpkinLv11

The power balance sucks, there is only 1 hp/dxd crossover that i read which had a good power balance where wizards were honestly garbage and could never get past high level of power not mentioning ultimate etc... funny thing is author wrote is in such vague way that i can't even guess current level of MC. Also even though it's my personal preference i utterly hate that he just tells everyone his and other secrets. Reading this i almost wish he said something that would make someone target him and cause everyone around him to die so he would learn to keep his mouth shut... I honestly hate then there is a super positive/naive protagonist in a world that can only be called darks af HP universe is dark and DxD is even worse and seeing someone like that in these worlds i wouldn't bet a broken piece of trash on him surviving there. So him actually surviving just makes me frustrated and feels like the only reason MC is alive is plot armour. Well that would be it for my rant i wish you luck with the fanfic, it's rather good but definitely not my taste. I also advice you to not buff the wizards as i saw many fanfics like that and it just killed them extremely fast, making new levels for wizards that mc can reach is ok but don't boost the general population si that aurors can suddenly fight middle and high level devils etc... Also i recomend you to look up dxd power levels and find out strongest/weakest characters of said level and their power/abilities and not ignore magical resistance of other races like devils etc.

1yr

Bananaking123
Bananaking123Lv3

Yo, i just see you write Dxd fic Here is my advice never write Dxd story by using Dxd anime as reference, Because unlike in light novel, dxd version anime ruin a lot of characters, especially Issei's characters hard to the point that reduce him into fanservice machine.

2yr
Throning
ThroningLv14

Reveal spoiler

1yr
PhantasmLord
PhantasmLordLv2

Reveal spoiler

1yr
Zuesofolypus
ZuesofolypusLv14

now i remember why i stopped reading this, the writer takes every chance to nerf the mc which completely ruins the entire thing

5mth
KnightyKing
KnightyKingLv1

It's HP and DxD smashed together. What can you ask for more? Other than killing Ron Weasley.... Me like it. xoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoox

1yr
tankcommander44
tankcommander44Lv1

Love the premise of the story for now. Idk if I like the harem part, but considering tom's age, well I'll continue to read for now. Hope for at least 100 more chapters!

1yr
AlastorGF
AlastorGFLv1

Sinceramente la historia me gusto pero lo único que me llego a molestar es la memoria de los personajes, prácticamente hacen un descubrimiento importante que ayudaría mucho en la trama, pero en el siguiente capitulo cuando buscan esa misma información se les olvida que lo saben y encima hablan de lo molesto que es no saber esa misma información

1yr
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