Review Detail of Marmora in GOT/ASOIAF: Son of the Unworthy

That is a fair take to have but you seem to be ignoring the fact Westeros was taken over in less than two years by three people whereas MC has close to twenty... its not comparable. And citing Old Valyria is a fruitless venture as Martin just wrote 'they had hundreds of dragons and in five thousand years they somehow could not take over the world because they would not work for my story'... The only reason Valyria did not dominate the world was because of plot, the Dothraki destroyed the Great Grass kingdoms in less than twenty years and they did not have dragons... plus you are also making the assumption that people are not just bidding there time and lowering there heads to see where the dust settles before acting, the only chance they have at surviving is bending the knee as NO free city has an army, they do not have the men to combat Aerion's forces let alone his dragons... if you think a couple thousand sell swords are going to stop what Aerion is bringing then you are very mistaken and honestly it mainly just seems like you want people on his side to die for little to no reason when Aerion has everything in his favor.

I was waiting for you to respond to me, after all, you respond to everyone who criticizes your story. Regarding Aegon, he had such an easy conquest because no one knew how to fight against a dragon. Of the three who did not kneel, showing resistance, two made the worst decisions. Harren hid in his castle confident that the stone would not burn. And the Two Kings decided to flank the Targaryens on a plain of dry field against the wind of the armies, while the Targaryen forces were securely against the wind. As for the Dornish, they were not presumptuous or arrogant enough to go chest to chest against the dragons or even wait sitting. So much so that they brought down a dragon and resisted Aegon's wrath for years. Despite constant invasions for years, Dorne resisted; they resisted for almost 200 years, and Dorne only knelt to the Iron Throne through marriage, not war. Even though the MC has 20 dragons, the Targaryen House at its peak had 21 dragons, and the Blacks during the Dance had 11 dragons. Yet, the dragon riders faced various problems within Westeros, where they had the greatest dominion and prestige; imagine then in Essos. And do you know how Meereen sees Daenerys? As a violent foreigner who goes against their customs and beliefs, punishing them without apparent reason. They don't like her at all, so much so that in the books, Dany realizes that she brings more pain to these slaver cities than peace. Even Aegon lost many things in the conquest. The Dothraki kept attacking the Kingdom of Sarnor, which was basically in a "civil war," and the Kingdom of Sarnor only paid attention to the Dothraki when it was too late, after they had sacked several cities of the Kingdom of Sarnor. This was the only Kingdom that the Dothraki "destroyed," and it took much more than 20 years. Additionally, Khal Mengo had united all Dothraki tribes and khalasars under his rule, and the Kingdom of Sarnor still considered them insignificant. And if you think mercenaries are a joke for dragons, who can solve everything in a day, you are very mistaken. Just look at the War for the Stepstones; Daemon with Caraxes, supported by Viserys with gold, plus the Velaryon fleet and an army of mercenaries, assassins, landless adventurers, and second sons, took two years to conquer the Stepstones. And even after that, there were still several problems. I accept almost all narrative devices, like a harem or that all MC's children are noble and perfect, without any apparent flaws, and that all siblings love each other. Which is impossible; anyone with a large family knows that. The MC did not face a single difficulty throughout the entire work, and now everyone is surrendering to him without even resisting. I can't buy that at all. And you say, 'when Aerion has everything in his favor.' Yes, you are the scriptwriter, you can do anything, that's why he 'has everything in his favor,' that's why everyone is kissing up to him. And where did you get this '"Martin just wrote 'they had hundreds of dragons and in five thousand years they somehow could not take over the world because they would not work for my story'"? Please send the link of him saying that, if you can."

Alright, so that was an info dump and a half but what I got from it is you think the Free Cities should be able to put up more of a fight and they should have some dragon fighting knowledge even though they have never actually faced dragons... no one living has. The people who 'rule' the Free Cities and are 'facing' Aerion are the rich and that is just indisputable fact, they do not have Princes and or Kings with ancient bloodlines, in fact the oldest people with 'claims' to rule the Free Cities is actually House Targaryen as the Free Cites where founded by Dragon Lords and Old Valyria... House Targaryen are kind of the only Dragon Lords left worth that title at this point, its a coming home ceremony and not even a real conquest at this point if you really think about it. But lets ignore the fact that the Free Cities are not anything like the the Rhoynar or the Ghiscari as they are the remnants of Old Valyria and a good portion of them would actually look forward to the return of the magical Empire of old. The Free Cities all have one thing that you seem to have completely ignored besides no armies to face Aerion... they all have a heavy dose of R'hllor worshipers and I have not been subtle with the fact that R'hllor is backing the Mc... in fact that is the entire point of this 'arc' of the story. I think you also mentioned that his family should all be fighting and have disputes with one another and they are to lovey dovey or something... most of them are going to marry each other and those who aren't and actually do dislike each other know for a fact Aerion has not problem bending them over his knee and showing them some good old fashion 'tough love'... but honestly to me it seems you where expecting to much from a crack fic that I said was going to be 50 chapters and just got out of hand... its free entertainment bro, read it or don't at the end of the day there is nothing I can do to force you nor would I try to . But I do enjoy the new perspective you have given me about this fic I have enjoyed writing, thanks for that I suppose.

Continuing, PART 1 And I don't expect a crack fanfic, so much so that I mentioned in the critique, 'PS: Yes, I know this is a fanfic, and I shouldn't take it too seriously; it's for fun.' I read a lot of garbage, and I see many arrogant authors. So much so that I mentioned that I like this story, really like it, even with some very bad things. What I don't like and what bothers me is simply that the MC (Main Character) hasn't faced a single obstacle. He hasn't had a single problem throughout the entire work. The only challenge he had (if you can call it that) was against Daemon in a tournament, and now, in the work, the anti-slavery MC is going to conquer slaver cities without any war. They didn't even try to resist the foreigners (Even to Volantis, the Targaryens are foreigners) trying to destroy their culture. Like you said, 'when Aerion has everything in his favor,' seriously? You literally gave him the power of the scriptwriter; he has no problems, everything he does turns out right. He rediscovered Valyrian steel and created the world's largest bank effortlessly, and he has 19 perfect children, not to mention the advance of his empire, none of which causes any problems. I don't even have a problem with his children; I don't care about his children (after all, except for one, they all seem to have the same personality), even though it's very illogical for this not to end in tragedy. What I literally feel is that the universe is bending over backward for the MC, and the only reason for that is because he has the script on his side. In short, what bothers me is that everyone, even the gods, is bowing down to the MC, not generating any problems; everything always goes 100% right for him, all just because he has the script by his side. Serious, tell me, author, what were the difficulties he faced throughout the work? Is there much more I could say, but I think it's good, right? And about the MC's 'good old tough love,' I summarize it in this Gif.

Imagine this as a PART 3 If you didn't understand Part 1 well, imagine this. You are from the United States, right? Picture a scenario where Russia becomes so powerful that it invades and conquers the United States. Now, the new leader is a Russian monarch who has killed thousands and is bringing in their people and foreign customs to the country. On top of that, the leader is forcefully implementing Communism and Monarchy, destroying the entire culture. And any state that opposes him, the Russian monarch destroys using 'bombs.' How would Americans feel about this? Would they accept it willingly? Wouldn't there be revolts? Author, if you had the opportunity, wouldn't you try to assassinate this Russian monarch? Or would you willingly accept that Divine King Sergei eradicated inequality and punished millionaires and billionaires? This is basically what will happen if the MC takes Volantis with an anti-slavery stance, not to mention other cities that have and create additional problems. Sorry if I upset a Russian comrade with my comment.

Alright I think I get it you don't speak English or something and are translating to Russian or something and there seems to be some misunderstanding. Do me a favor and google what a 'Crack Fic' is because you don't seem to understand, this is like reading someone complaining about One Punch Man solving everything in a single punch... like seriously dude it is supposed to be this way. That is the entire point of the fan fic, I said that like three times at the start that this was meant to be a short and sweet fan fic less than 50 chapters long as I just wanted to write about the idea I had and then end it. But even so I will humor you and talk about how you are comparing House Targaryen (A House founded and lived in Essos for thousands of years) to Russia and Essos to America... I mean do you not know that only 300ish years have passed since House Targaryen was still actually living in Essos? House Targaryen is more foreign in Westeros than they are in Essos, they still even follow Old Valyrian customs most of the time and refer to themselves as 'Blood of Old Valyria' which if you somehow don't know is apart of Essos. Your entire argument that Valyrians are foreigners to Essos just tells me everything I need to know, you have no idea what you are talking about calling Targaryens foreign to the land that birthed them. But even ignoring that that, you once more mentioned he is facing zero opposition? Multiple times I have showed him burning 20% of a city to ash and throwing any naysayers into the fire... he is burning all of the 'opposition' so... yea... you wont here from the pile of ash on the ground about how unimportant there opinions are because they are not of sound mind and body anymore since they are quite fully... ash.

I see, I was confused how you worded it before but I see what you are saying now with your comparison. Since you want to use Volantis specifically I will focus on them for a second, Volantis is debatably the easiest of the Free Cities to conqueror so I appreciate that you used it in your example. Volantis has five slaves to every one 'free person' and the VAST majority of those slaves are devoted worshipers of the Lord of Light... I am sure you can easily see where this is going. The only thing keeping the slaves chained is the fact that most of the people 'in power' are those who live within the black walls which is a dragon fused circular wall within the city of Volantis that houses the rich and keeps them safe from a slave revolt. A single dragon could blow off all the gates to this wall and melt tons of holes in the wall allowing a slave revolt to reach the heart of the city and Mc wouldn't even have to move a single finger to be crowned as the ruler of the city as the MAIN church of R'hllor is in Volantis and they are supporting him and will rally the common folk and freed slaves into crowning him. He does not need to make peace with the old 'rulers' as he can easily have every last drop of there blood purged and can start a new path for the city with the now massive populace of 'free men' who will be begging for guidance and food. Which Aerion has long since prepared for, he made friends with many of the Riverland Lords and Reach Lords just so he could have vast stores of food ready to feed Volantis specifically with plans prepared to ramp up food production around the city for the following years and future generations.

Regarding him being Andal... Check the family tree again buddy, every single person in his family tree back to Aegon the Conqueror had the 'Blood of the Dragon' with only Aemma Arryn not being an actual Valyrian Family but her Mother was a Targaryen.

What is the problem? If it's a Crack Fic, you don't need to keep finding excuses to say that something is possible, and you shouldn't take it too seriously, after all, it's a Crack Fic. Most of the things you mention, I have already explained. "I'll separate it into two comments, I exceeded the permitted limit. PART 1... Not to mention that in the books, freeing the slaves caused many problems, with former slaves enslaving their old masters, or slaves not wanting to be liberated. Have you ever heard the phrase "The dream of the oppressed is to be the oppressor"?" And I didn't mention, but even in Volantis being the main location of the R'hllor religion, Benerro is capable of starting a Civil War and Holy War within Volantis. There are many problems with just freeing slaves, if you are from the United States and studied history you know this very well. My country was also a colony and slave country, and historically that doesn't work out very well. I'm not saying that slavery is good, but just freeing them without a social reintroduction plan causes problems for the slaves themselves. Seriously, "Volantis has five slaves to every one 'free person' and the VAST majority of those slaves are devoted worshipers of the Lord of Light..." Where did you get that the GREAT majority of slaves are devotees of R'hllor? Not to mention that the things you say and the MC does would break the entire world's economy. Daenerys herself broke the world's economy by meddling in Meereen, Yunkai, and Astapor. Check the family tree again, Jaehaerys I's grandmother is of First Men descent, Jaehaerys I's mother also did not have the 'blood of the dragon,' as you mentioned Aemma I'll skip her, very likely Daenaera also did not have the 'blood of the dragon,' and the MC's own grandmother also did not have the 'blood of the dragon.' And the 'blood of the dragon' referred only to the Dragonlords."

Nothing has to be 'wrong' to respond to you and hold a conversation, I genuinely enjoy conversation with some one critical of my work as it helps me improve even when they call me a idiot for no reason other than to make themselves feel better after presumable having read 200k words of my work wasting there own free time reading the words of an 'idiot'. But anyways you bend the narrative in your favor by referencing like three instances of ex-slaves wanting to go back into chains whereas the vast majority wanted freedom and where willing to fight and die for it... the ENTIRE reason they wanted to go back into chains is they did not have a job anymore or means to provide for themselves and where starving... which is not a problem as I have already said the Mc is prepared to fund the feeding of the ex-slaves after the Conquest, it wont be reasonable to do so long term but a few years he could easily do as he has sold multiple Valyrian steel weapons to various Houses in Westeros and made multiple millions just off that alone not counting anything he has done to make coin, such as his trading fleet. My entire point with the family tree was that the mc is Valyrian and not Andal and I should have just said blood of Valyria but you probably already knew that and wanted to be flippant anyway... you need only look at the official wiki for Daenerys in canon and her 'race' is listed as Valyrian even though she has much more 'watered down' blood compared to Aerion who has much more Valyrian blood than future Danny does... but I am confident you already knew that and you just wanted to continue on with the moot point.

Honestly after rereading over everything you have said I might would believe it if you said you where Ghiscari yourself or something as it seems you just don't like the idea of the slaves going free or the idea that the Mc plans to use the death of slavery to endear himself to the future freed populace to gain there favor... mighty sus.

Come on, you deleted two of my comments? How childish. Looks like I got under your skin, huh? These ideas you have are totally communist and would never work. But I'll stop messing with you; otherwise, you'll start crying soon.

I didn't delete anything that was a shadow ban because something you said tripped the automatic response, like the last message I sent that got auto deleted for some reason. I had to go to your profile to see what those messages where when I responded because I saw you did respond but it was deleted. I am going to be honest, after 7624 books read I would have thought you understood this app does that some times.

This exact message you just sent is deleted and I had to go to your profile to see it after getting a notification you responded...

Seriously, it seems like you're fabricating evidence for your alibi. In my last comment, there was nothing that would trigger an automatic ban, if that automatic ban really exists. Let's see if this one will also be banned, putting the narrative in his favor once again.

Not to mention that the ban times don't seem to match up. Before, it would take hours to get banned after a comment; now it's a matter of minutes. Seriously, isn't that strange? This and another thing are strange and don't seem to fit very well.

Dude what are you even saying? All of the messages are still visible on your profile so there is 0 reason for me to be deleting them since anyone could still find them. If I wanted to delete anything it would have just been the whole review instead of two random messages as then NO ONE could see any of it again unless you reposted... and then I would delete it again to keep anyone from seeing. You make some crazy jumps from one thing to another and it seems a common occurrence with you having repeatedly done this.

It also didn't take hours before for your messages to get deleted, as soon as you posted them they got taken down. It took ME hours to respond to your message because I have a life outside of Webnovel and I am not sitting here waiting for you to respond.

"as soon as you posted them they got taken down." So how did you respond to the ones that got banned? The last messages I saw being deleted, you replied within minutes, and the message got banned within minutes. But the other messages took hours to get 'banned.' So we have two scenarios, first, you saw minutes after my posts and were already commenting on them before they were deleted. Where you would have to have seen and be responding within minutes. Or the second scenario, you just deleted my comments.