webnovel
Zhoa_Fei
Zhoa_FeiLv132yr
2022-10-29 01:39

Overall there are something to be desired with the presentation of the story. The dialogue could be better separated and some of the run on sentences should be addressed. Though that doesn't mean that this story is inherently bad. It could just use some polishing. The meat of the story is very satisfying and the character relationships actually have life to them. I can buy them being together. Your intro chapter was really good.

WE CAN'T BE YOUR BROTHER ANYMORE

AYESHA_FAHIM
4.7
14 Chs

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Other Reviews
Axel_Ash
Axel_AshLv1

The title of your book is super good no doubt, your plot is strong, I love your character arrangement, and I'm pretty sure your story will be super good.

2yr

Maryam_Mayo
Maryam_MayoLv1

There is only one chapter, so perhaps it's too early for a review, but I got captivated by the cover of course, but the synopsis was just the opposite which increased my interest. Furthermore the way you start the story form the childhood of all the characters, I think it will be easier for the readers to know the leading characters of your novels very well, and overall it was fun to read, keep writing waiting you to reveal other characters and chapters too. Good Luck for your new book :)

2yr
onedaysomedayy
onedaysomedayyLv11

Love the start of the novel! It's adorable with in-depth characters. The story is entertaining with great details and character dynamics. Can't wait for updates as the story progresses. Great job!

2yr
Rin_Nurnia
Rin_NurniaLv4

The story is nice although I suggest you to separate the dialogues into new paragraphs. When you combined all of them in one paragraph, it's a bit confusing to read. A short example: "Dialogue," said Henry. (new paragraph) "Dialogue," Frankie smiled.

2yr
_Carolina_writes_
_Carolina_writes_Lv4

I have read your book. The plot of your story is good. But there are more thing you need to know and work on your story to make it much better so that you can get contract.1. Synopsis: should summarize your story but it should be mysterious so that reader would be curious to read your book. 2. Grammatical mistake and dialogues improvement.Other than that your story plot is good if you correct these things you might get contract.

1yr
somi_n
somi_nLv2

I know it's a little too early to review but I just have to. Just reading the synopsis and first chapter got me immersed in this book. And I dropped romance novels a long time ago. I think the synopsis and first chapter just made me think twice about dropping romance novels. Great write up!

2yr
Jenival_Enyia
Jenival_EnyiaLv12

I love the way the author took me from the beginning of the book till the end. It shows the writing quality and thoughtfulness of the author and I can't wait to read more!

2yr
Moonwriting
MoonwritingLv4

Curious to know more about the story..I already like the characters and the world you build around them is marvellous and [img=recommend]keep it up

2yr
KiranAwan
KiranAwanLv1

First of all, its synopsis is very well defined, From which the story can be determined.The start is commendable.👍😊 Hope it will be an interesting story, because the idea of ​​writing such a story does not come to everyone, so I appreciate your creativity and intelligence👏, As far as I am concerned, it will be fun while reading this story and now I would like to know more about how it goes up and down😎. So keep writing like this👀

2yr
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