[Reviewed on: 08-09-2022] [Reading status: 3 chapters] [Reviewed by: Aysel Inara] -*-*-*-*- REMARKS: - Synopsis seems decent. - Cover needs a change. - Before I move to chapter-wise details, let me ask the author. What does your book has to offer? What makes it different from the 80% romance books? - I can name you 20 books which start exactly like this. How is your opening different? Not to sound rude or anything, even though you can delete this review later on if you wish to. But an opening should be catchy and different from the other books. - Would you personally read a book which starts as cheating sister and fiance, calling off engagement, moving away etc? I can assure you a reader has already read minimum 10 such books with same starting. Why should they read one more? - I am pretty sure you must have made some differences ahead, but first 3 chapters are the core point of the book. If it can't hook the readers with any unique element then they won't read ahead. - Punctuation is messed up a lot in chapter 3 which is 70% dialogues with little descriptions. ~ Deepest apologies for this review.
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I corrected chapter 3 and also I am really grateful for your review, I may or may not get contracted after this review because I can say from this..that I have little or no chance to get contracted, but all the same it's my first work and there is always room for improvement...so I want to say a big thank you
I can't say you won't get contract because the writing itself ie decent enough to get one. Although you can still change the initial chapters you know? 😬 Tweak it a bit. For example, when she gets to the hotel and catches the duo, FL takes some knife or weapon with her. Make her beat the guy and cut of sister’s hair. Then add some impressive dialogue like "I will come for revenge, I will haunt you till you wish to die." Add tweaks like this. Keep the chapters, just add bit more 'different' things.
sure ma'am I will definitely
