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ChaosInvoker
ChaosInvokerLv22yr
2022-09-05 01:44

There's quite a bit of potential in your work. Introducing us to the main cast from the start was helpful, too. Given a bit of polishing, there's no reason this won't end up becoming quite a hit. As a minor bit of advice, I hope you avoid drawing too much inspiration from the local soap operas in our country. I know the local series we have are really popular, but they're not the best models to follow if you really want to do your best and come up with something memorable. PS - the 'thanks and 'to be continued' at the end isn't really necessary :)

Ugly Prince

Master Kompanyero
Not enough ratings
29 Chs

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Other Reviews
MasterKompanyero
MasterKompanyeroLv1

Hey, what's up, where you been? I've been waiting by my phone I don't know what to think I've been trynafigure you out After hours, can you tell I've been workin' hard lately? Tryin' now to find a way to get to you You're on my mind And I want you as mine But you, you waste my time So I'm always runnin' Don't turn away I'm not, not what they say But you're not used to fate So you're always runnin' Just friends don't do what we do What we do, can't do without you Just friends don't say what we say What we do, can't do without you Without you, yeah Without you, without you, oh Without you, uh You can try, try to hide You been playin' it cool I don't know how to act Wish I could take it all back But you know I'll be here When you need me, and you're callin' Tryin' now to find a way get to me, ah You're on my mind And I want you as mine But you, you waste my time So I'm always runnin' Don't turn away I'm not, not what they say But you're not used to fate So you're always runnin' Just friends don't do what we do What we do, can't do without you Just friends don't say what we say What we do, can't do without you All I want, all I need is your location Drivin' down 405, no hesitation (no hesitation) All I want, all I need is your location ('cation, ooh) Drivin' down 405, no hesitation Just friends don't do what we do What we do, can't do without you Just friends don't say what we say What we do, can't do without you Without you, yeah Without you, without you, oh Without you, uh Without you, uh

2yr

Lemn
LemnLv1

It is an interesting novel, from the beginning you can see the problems of the protagonist and emotional factors, such as love. It seems to me that the author needs to revise some things in the writing, but I don't think it's a serious problem.

2yr
Katiespheres
KatiespheresLv3

Your story has potential author.Keep writing and never give up.Good job and best of luck[img=coins][img=coins][img=coins][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp]

2yr
Per_Sona_9919
Per_Sona_9919Lv1

For a start, wow, it's so wonderful to see a boy who loves to write, from my point of view, it's such a rare event for me to come across you. I encourage you. I love supporting people who have such amazing ambition. The novel is good, it reminded me of a period when I was obsessed with this genre. I loved the way the plot was and how the family relationship was in the beginning. It only needs to mention some details to support the background of the world more and bring the picture closer to the reader. With a little tweaking and correction in the future, you'll make a buzz and shine. The very rapid events also made me a little dumbfounded at first, perhaps because it's been a while since I've been reading a novel of this kind and I'm not used to it. With that, wow. It's like I'm watching a drama. fighting. [img = يوصي]

2yr
Fallency
FallencyLv13

Reading this work feels like watching a drama play out right in front of you! The story is engaging. It has a lot of potential. There were a few grammatical errors but not enough to take away the interest from the plot. All in all, it was a good read.

2yr
booky101
booky101Lv13

Your piece shows great potential and honestly with the story line I feel like I am watching a drama play out before me. It needs a bit of polishing in some areas but I would love to read more. Keep up the good work!

2yr
Favour_Stephen5651
Favour_Stephen5651Lv4

I love how short and simple your synopsis is and its very understandable to me. But please enlighten on it more because some people won't really understand. I love your start up too. Keep up the good work 👍

2yr
steph_pesi
steph_pesiLv3

It's a really good book and I like the concept. It has a great plot and it is likely to succeed if you just did a little tweak here and there with your word arrangements. I know it's hard having English as a second language but we can only try. Overall good book.

2yr
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