webnovel
Aiden_Horn
Aiden_HornLv132yr
2022-12-08 05:26

incredible work author one of the best novels ive read on this app please keep it up and expand this wonderful wonderful world

Liked it!

LIKE
empty img

No replies. Be the first!

Other Reviews
Prince_nonchalant
Prince_nonchalantLv3

Firstly, this story is most certainly unique. I love the vivid descriptions and the way the author brings the story to us. At the time of writing this, there are only 5 chapters so I'll review based on those. Synopsis: Your synopsis is pretty nice and captivating. It sets the expectations and so far seems to meet them. Not much can be criticized there. Writing Quality: Your word choices are phenomenal. Great descriptions and lovely ways of describing both characters and backgrounds. In terms of grammar, you're doing far better than a lot of English speakers. However, I did see a few incomplete words and badly organized sentences but I'll give this 5 stars since you stated that you're no English speaker. Story Development: This is the reason I didn't give you a full 5. While I love the descriptions and the figure of speeches used, I think you overdid it. There's a thing called too much and there was certainly more than the average reader would like to see in just a few paragraphs. If I'm not mistaken, just the first 4 opening paragraphs had like maybe around a total of 6 or so figures of speeches clumped together. That's way too much and it can confuse readers. Not everyone can read between lines so it's best to limit how many figures of speech you use. I used to do this too and I said something like "Kitchen utensils sang from the kitchen due to the shaking" and a reader was like "How the f*** are kitchen utensils singing?". You have to be mindful not to overdo these things in your writing as it can make it unreadable and it did confuse me at some parts too. Character Design and World Background: Already stated that the designs for both the backgrounds and characters were stunning so full marks there. Just try not to overdo it. Overall: 4.6 because the story has potential but it is most definitely confusing at parts. I think you're making your story wayyy too complex. Calm down a bit and relax. Everyone likes to see stunning descriptions now and then, not every 2 sentences. Fix these minor issues and you'll be good to go. Good luck author!

Related Stories

The Runic Alchemist

Ben, a postgraduate chemistry student, envisions a future where science unlocks the secrets of the universe. But fate has other plans. In a sudden twist, Ben dies and awakens in a strange new world, reborn as a five-year-old boy named Damian Sunblade. Damian's joy at being part of a noble family is short-lived. His family, valuing gold over blood, sells him off to another noble house to be groomed as a homemaker husband, a mere pawn in their political games. Struggling with his new reality and the remnants of his past life’s knowledge, Damian refuses to succumb to his fate. In his new household, Damian discovers that this world is governed by magic circles, Runic symbols wielding immense power. Driven by his scientific curiosity, Damian begins to experiment. Applying the laws of physics to the Rune symbols, he deciphers their secrets and invents his own unique form of magic. However, The family that bought him has their own plans for him, seeing Damian as a valuable tool to enhance their power. But Damian, ever the independent spirit, has dreams beyond servitude. He longs for freedom, a place to call his own—a life where he can use his talents without restraint. And so Damian devises a daring plan to escape. His journey is fraught with danger and intrigue, as he navigates a world filled with mystical creatures, powerful adversaries, and ancient secrets. Along the way, he forges alliances and battles enemies, all while refining his magical and scientific skills. In "The Runic Alchemist," follow Damian Sunblade’s epic quest for independence and self-discovery. Witness his transformation from a forsaken child to a formidable Alchemist, determined to carve out an extraordinary future for himself in a world teeming with infinite possibilities. ***** Author Note : Hello! GlaringError here! As I have already mentioned in my author review I am restating it here since I am getting tons of comments about it, that I am more of a reader myself than a writer, I made this novel in an attempt to capture my fantasy world residing in my mind into words.. Writing is new for me.. The premise of my novel is inspired by many great works that I have loved over the years. And some elements I have in my novel that are slightly similar to them but it's just the skeleton of it, the real meat of the plot is entirely my own cooking. Some of the influence that is more noticeable is from The Runesmith (By Kuropon), The King's Avatar (By Butterfly Blue) and Shadow Slave (By Guiltythree). I have immense respect for these legends and I can only hope to follow in their footsteps. To all those who comment just by judging the name, at least give it a chance before letting your opinions be known. Thank you.

GlaringError · Fantasy
4.3
474 Chs