Review Detail of Khalid97 in DON
Review detail
Good novel so far, I've currently read up to 33 chapters and although not top tier, it has the the potential to be. Once it shows more of its potential I'll upgrade this rating to five.
DON
SMwrites
Liked by 1 people
LIKEReplies3
I see. Thanks for the insight! When writing this novel, I wanted to showcase the difference in level between the lowest and highest when it comes to a certain field. I have written the rest of the novel already and I feel that to keep a natural feeling I should not change what transpires. However, a lot of the things that you've mentioned that you would like to see will be addressed in a prequel that I have planned for Mayr. I may release that in the future so please keep an eye out for that!
Khalid97:I think he's missing individualism as himself, instead it feels like mayr is reliving his teenage years with his adult knowledge. We don't really see him in danger against his peer group, nor do we really believe they can, and adults underestimate him as a smart delinquent. He's in this grey area where although ideal, does not have a lot of growth potential. A possible path would be us seeing him continue to care and raise his men mentally and physically until they are capable men. This could start the arch where they turn into an organisation and make their way when they are in their early twenties. Another route could be to relink with his old bodies crew and absorb his new people and continue to expand into other countries. A third route could be to appear legit with a hand in legal and illegal business. Most of all I'd like this story to feel like it could go either way and not feel like the MC has plot amour with everything going his way.
I think he's missing individualism as himself, instead it feels like mayr is reliving his teenage years with his adult knowledge. We don't really see him in danger against his peer group, nor do we really believe they can, and adults underestimate him as a smart delinquent. He's in this grey area where although ideal, does not have a lot of growth potential. A possible path would be us seeing him continue to care and raise his men mentally and physically until they are capable men. This could start the arch where they turn into an organisation and make their way when they are in their early twenties. Another route could be to relink with his old bodies crew and absorb his new people and continue to expand into other countries. A third route could be to appear legit with a hand in legal and illegal business. Most of all I'd like this story to feel like it could go either way and not feel like the MC has plot amour with everything going his way.
SMwrites:Thanks for the review! What do you think the novel is missing?