*Writing Quality: Excellent, not too complicated to hush you away, not too simple to make you believe it's mediocre, it draws you in and tells the story without much effort, great grammar.
*Stability of Updates: As a new novel it is still not following any rigorous schedule.
*Story Development: I only read the first chapters until the story began, and it was described and written well enough to allow me to relate with the MC, the parents, the friend and his situation as to why he would enter the game at all, however, perhaps because I haven't dwelled further it's difficult for me to understand what makes the game special, he received a message saying if he was bored of his life, but what does the game offer? and why would he encounter it in a private message rather than a poster in the streets, the game isn't public? etc.. etc... it lacks a point of inflexion that would attract readers in my opinion.
Like that small thing that makes your novel unique, this, however, doesn't mean it's mediocre, this point of inflexion could appear in the future.
*Character Design: So far I have seen MC some of the in-game characters, even interaction between NPCs and they're loyal to one another.
*World Background: The entire premise envelops the game and I haven't delved further into the game to accurately judge whether it is deep enough or lacking, but I'm truly unable to understand what makes the game especial, supposing it allows you to get money in the real world, is that really it?
Overall in my personal opinion, find myself with confused emotions regarding this novel, for one the structure is solid, grammar is perfect, description of events happens fluently, the in-game elements or representation of the UI in words is also properly laid on, but the premise is weak, it lacks a deterministic point which will attract readers to stick with it rather than keep scrolling.
The cover also needs some improvements, overall I give it a high score because unlike most novels in this site, this is the total opposite, some of them have interesting premises but due to lack of skill they're destroyed either by bad grammar or a world that's not properly structured, etc...
In this case, the world is properly structured, the grammar is perfect, but the world itself is weak and doesn't lead to anything that would attract (at least me) to read further because I can envision MC perhaps completing some quests and getting strong, beating a boss and obtaining loot, gaining money in real life, perhaps that's not how you want it to be, and instead plan something bigger for him, but that's how I perceived it with several short chapters and you need to portray that as well for them before the reader departs.
Best Regards!
