Review Detail of kqwxz in Dawn of Eternal

A good opening with it's currently 24 chapters, the characters have a clear motivation and the story setup is interesting. There is some room for improvement in the writing such as grammar and sentence structures and in the more descriptive parts. Sometimes we get the explanation after it already happened which makes the story a bit choppy. Overall right now there's alot of room for improvement which at times take away from the story at certain points but also means that this already interesting story can get even better. Looking forward to reading more. Keep it up!