Review Detail of Kana_Haisha in Three Cigarettes in an Ashtray (GL)

This review was written after Ch 13 had been published. Overall, this is an extremely well-written novel. The word choice is superb and descriptions are apt given the setting of the world. The descriptions themselves are incredibly vivid without over-describing, leaving just enough for the reader to imagine on their own. There were only a handful of grammar mistakes (less than 1/ch), and none were disruptive the reading experience. If I were to turn this in to my editor (journalist), they would be ecstatic with its quality. The characters too, are extremely well-done, with dynamics and relationships being incredibly interesting and real, even with the incredibly slow pace, and even that serves the story extremely well. With that being said, following the kiss shared between Howells and Hayes, I started to lose interest in the story. Sure, there were consequences to it, and it was either a rising action or the climax of the story (not enough is written to characterize it as either), but those consequences were seemingly minimal. That doesn't necessarily mean that the characters never think about it again or it doesn't influence their decisions, but that the feelings don't change. There is the same sense of tension there always was between them, the kiss merely served as a momentary respite from that tension. But that in it of itself was not enough to put me off reading, hardily so. The masterful construction of paragraphs and emotions really grasps my attention, even if the plot is heading in a predictable direction - I still feel the need to read it anyway. However, again following the kiss, both Hayes and Howells become extremely unlikable. I understand that I'm not the target audience for this novel, I'm just a dude in my 20s, but Howells becomes nearly incomprehensible in her feelings. She evidently feels conflicted, and the author does a great job portraying this conflict and the damage the kiss and the actions that followed did to her pride, but why Howells came to this conclusion is downright bizarre to me. Why would it matter if Hayes was acting with instinct or thought, it didn't change the fact that she was giving herself to you. Yet, Howells continues down this path, causing what should be irreparable damage to their relationship. Hayes too, becomes extremely unlikable. Howells essentially unjustly accuses her of something Hayes should have no reason to understand or agree with, yet Hayes then goes on to portray exactly those things. While before the kiss, Hayes was envisioned as an aloof and emotionally-distant, borderline-genius writer whose narcotic habits and nightly forays kept her in trouble. After the kiss, Hayes accuses her of being emotionally-distant, and it's clear that Hayes does feel for Howells, but instead of exploring that line of thought, Hayes seemingly turns cold and callous. Sure, she initially tried to talk to Howells about it, but instead of pressing on and either getting some kind of conclusion, she gives up and becomes kind of a prick to Howells, who does rightly deserve it, but even still it goes against Hayes's true intent. At least that's my perspective. These characters themselves follow their own structure, and in that sense they are very realistic. However, despite their realism, I now have nobody to root for, and instead find myself being drawn more to Welch and his smart retorts rather than the two characters around which the plot revolves. As, even in his short amount of screen time, is a hell of a lot more sympathetic than a cold and callous dope-addict who can act like an asshole, and our protagonist who seems to be an asshole more than not. Of course, all of my criticisms are personal nitpickings of a plot with characters I have subjectively come to dislike more than an objective analysis. And perhaps I've misinterpreted along the way. All in all, it is extremely well-written, with writing that keeps readers interested despite a predictable plot and extraordinarily slow pacing. It is a phenomenal piece of work, and I look forward to seeing out the conclusion of this piece along with future writings. Best regards.