Well, the story is interesting in terms of backstory, but the character writing, world-building, and how you handle the plot leave much to be desired. I'll be honest with you, the way you handled the girl. in that alley and how you then took him home because if for the sake of the plot it was forced you changed his personality to Serena the moment he activated in Marvel as opposed to when he was on Krypton the Protagonist feels super fake and makes decisions that by the way, you described it was stupid. Why did you decide to stay with the girl and her family if you didn't want to? maybe you had another intention when doing that but it didn't work for you. My advice structure your story and improve your character build. The idea was interesting and in fact, if you decide to rewrite this you have my full support because I think you have a lot of potentials, and the fact that you dared to publish is admirable, you already took the first step now just worry about improving, Good luck.
Liked by 3 people
LIKE
Thanks for the reply
I just write this as a hobby which is why I haven't planned a fixed plotline before I started to write. Whenever something comes to my mind, I write it down as the next chapter. That might be the reason for the inconsistency in the plot.
As for the character interaction between Serena and Kar-el, in Dc kar-el had a fixed goal to accomplish which is why he didn't have much development with her but in marvel, he isn't sure what his end goal might be so he focused more on building relationships. There is also the factor that in Dc, he had others too as a family but in marvel, Serena was the only one left in his family. Also, there are quite a few time skips after coming to marvel which is also another reason to explain the development in their behavior.
