Review Detail of Valiantis in The Devil's Abyss

Hello! Newbie Author Here! An idea for a novel just popped into my mind and here I am, writing a novel! xD First of all, english isn’t my first language so I apologize in advance if my grammar is wrong. Please do correct me if my grammar is wrong. I would also appreciate any feedback! This is my first novel so I don’t expect to do crazy good but I do wish to learn from it and improve my writing :D