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restful_sins
restful_sinsLv113yr
2021-09-18 06:50

I am never much for love stories but your use of the gods is amazing. and the way thag Elenore and Alex have the bond in the world. bravo author.

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Darine_ALRAMMAH
Darine_ALRAMMAHAuthor

Thank you! I hope you find the plot twist you're about to witness enjoyable. Best Wishes!

Other Reviews
Olympu
OlympuLv1

This is going to be a very long review! Writing quality - It's not too good, and not too bad. Stability of updates - No. Story Development - Standard. Character Design - Unique, not what I was expecting. World Background - The descriptions are standard too. Some tips: Cut out obvious descriptions. One of the most common traps that new writers fall into is using predictable words to describe something—for instance, writing a sentence like, “The blue sky was dotted with white, fluffy clouds.” For the most part, when someone hears the word “sky,” they’ll picture it blue, and when they picture clouds, they’ll picture them “white” and “fluffy.” Adjectives like these are unnecessary and can bog down your writing. Simply cut those descriptive words out of the sentence. “The sky was dotted with clouds” conjures the exact same image and is shorter and more focused. Use surprising words. Once your sentences are free of any obvious descriptive details, you have the space to pepper in some more interesting words. Pushing your descriptions in new and surprising directions will help your sentences be memorable for readers. For instance, if you want to describe a rainy day, the easy way to describe it would be to mention “the stormy sky”—but something a little more unique could be “the angry sky” or “the boiling sky.” Brainstorm common adjectives and other describing words and use them in unique ways to keep your writing fresh and interesting. Remember sensory details. A common adage for good descriptive writing is “show, don’t tell”—and sensory information is a great way to make that happen. Sprinkling in specific details that appeal to readers’ five senses (sight, hearing, taste, touch, and smell) will bring your scenes to life and make them feel richer and more interesting. Make use of figurative language. One of the most powerful literary devices that writers have is figurative language, which goes beyond literal definitions in order to describe things in a more interesting way. Comparisons like similes (using “like” or “as”) or metaphors (saying one thing is something else) can help paint instant pictures of your characters or settings; for instance, “His nose was a gnarled root growing out of his face” can pack a lot more punch than saying “His nose was twisted and misshapen.” Other types of figurative language include onomatopoeia, which uses words that sound like what they mean (e.g., “the pitter-patter of raindrops”), and hyperbole, which is a form of exaggeration (e.g., “he rang the doorbell a million times”). Think about who is doing the describing. In most points of view, you’ll be writing from a character’s perspective—either using “I” and “me” in first-person or “they” and “them” in third-person. It may not seem obvious at first, but point of view is a descriptive element that can help you build a believable world for your story. To use POV properly, make sure that you’re thinking about your character’s perspective as you describe so that the description feels true to the way they would speak. Be wary of over-description. To create effective descriptive writing, less is more. Try to limit yourself to one or two interesting details the first time you introduce a character or setting, and readers will fill in the rest. For instance, if you say “The cabin room was sparse except for the looming stuffed grizzly in the corner,” readers can fill in the details for themselves without you needing to describe the floorboards, the windows, the bedsheets, and what your character had for dinner last week. This will help readers remember each character or setting better than if you had an entire descriptive paragraph for each. Read good examples of descriptive writing. If you start to feel stuck when trying to write vivid description, look up a few of your favorite books or short stories and see how other writers do it. Pay attention to what they do that you like—whether it’s only writing their description in simple sentence structure or making sure that the following sentences include strong action to counteract the description. Then, sit down and try to replicate their tactics in a simple writing activity to see where it takes you. Have fun on your writing journey, and I hope you succeed.

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Path of the Goblin King (On Break)

Long ago Monsters of all shapes and sizes ruled the world causing early humans, dwarves and elves to live in only small communities hidden from the world ruled by monsters and beings of darkness alike. But with the creation of those three races gave birth to the gods that they worshipped and seeing the plight of their believers, they gave them the power they needed to fight back against the never ending hordes of monsters around the world. As time passed more and more monster races either died off completely or hid within the Monster Mountain Range, but the three races would have to deal with constant monster stampedes coming from the Monster Lands when their numbers got to high. This went on for centuries, until the humans, who took the brunt of the stampedes had enough and had the one only known as The Great Sage and his 10 disciples to cast a magic that effected the entirety of the monster lands, a curse placed upon all of monster kind. Monsters would have reduced birth rates, all children would be 9 times out of 10 females, and many other curses that varied from monster to monsters, but the weaker monsters had it the worst of all. The Goblins were most effected of all, Male Goblins could no longer get human females pregnant anymore to be used as BroodMothers, and 99 out of 100 pregnancies between goblins gave birth to female goblins, and to make it even worse still the males would always die to impregnate another goblin, effectively bringing the entirety of the goblin race to extinction. Worse still goblin women for the most part we’re great sex slaves for humans as their looks were attractive enough for it, but just barely for human standards it seems. But the god of monsters won’t let his children to go extinct that easily, The last male goblin was born, Blessed by the God of monsters, this marked the beginning of the Greatest Goblin King! ***** cover art made by artist Rapscallion ***** Forewarning later down the line their will be Futa’s added into the mix to give you guys a heads up

OneMoreScore · Others
4.8
91 Chs