The story starts with an interesting hook, it tug at my heart when the author wrote in great details about the emotions and desperations of people living in such a daunting life. And yes, what I say about the hook is good, but in regard to the score I given I felt that the story can improve. First and foremost, the writing quality, it's good, but need a lot of attention. There were sentences that needs pronouns, and some that need to be reworded. There were two to three words that I think the author has miss spelled. Also commas and quotation marks that are needed and aren't needed is a common issue I found. For the author, I point out two to three issue I found with comments in the story. Contrary to the writing quality, I gave the story development, and character design a four star because the story is still in progress. There wasn't much information given regarding the main character. Yes, there were a bit of description about the main character and his living situation. But I felt like I need more information to grasp the characteristic of main character; his personality, actions, emotions, skills, etc. all of which that makes him the protagonist of the story. As for world background, it's a bit different from the character design. There are details, but a bit vague. Chapter one seem to give reader an insight of the story setting, but at the same time also throw a bit of mystery. It kind of makes me want to rush the author the release the more chapters. I really want to know what kind of world is this!......I read the tags, ahem was not prepared to see that it is different from what I expect, lol. Author that's not the way you describe it in the story! I thought is was a war-fantasy kind of world background. Lol, well then I hope that the author will updates more and further explain the world background in future chapters. All in all, a good read. Author, continue on with the updates! I gave you a five for that [img=recommend]!
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