Review Detail of Omnitheus in Telly

Rating it with 5/5 Writing quality - I found minimal to none issues with writing that could be fixed with self proofreading. Really, it actually looks like it was written by someone using English as their first language. I would recommend though putting colors using figures of speech and idioms since it is set in a modern world. Maybe some pop reference to get a zeitgeist and comparison on the leads to actual people. Updates - can't complain. Quality > Quantity Story Dev't - The exposition of characters, to me, is a bit too long. The first two chapters should make or break whether the author could keep a reader hooked. I would recommend straying from too much info at the beginning. Since the author uses omniscient 3rd party writing, he/she could in corporate expositions within scenes to justify an act. Too much of the setting right at the start could easily go stale and readers want to read fiction and think. Make them. Character design - Both were well thought of like the author has actual knowledge or experience of the professions the characters have. All in all, with a few modification with the writing style, it could be narrated better, especially that this is told in two perspectives which should make it interesting. See more of your writings around.