Review Detail of Riyah404 in The Dream Saga

This story has an interesting plot. The main character is good and introduced quite well. The pacing is a bit fast. Maybe it's only me but there are too many dialogues. The MC is saying everything out loud. I think there are times that we need to see what the MC is seeing and not just hear it from him. Grammar also needs to be improved. But all in all this story has potential. Keep on improving and updating!