Review Detail of NightClouds in Devil Child

As of CH 14: Very interesting topic! The characters are all so lively and feel like they all play a role in the story! Grammer issues are very minimal so kudos on that! Only thing would be show more, tell less and more sentence(length) variety. That way the story is more flowy :) Overall, love the idea! Although some people may think that the beginning chapters are very choppy, I actually like them since it represents the MC's mental state where everything is confusing and he doesn't understand! Adds flavor!