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Mel_Aniv
Mel_AnivLv44yr
2021-05-05 23:35

REVIEW Narration: Decent and immersive Worldbuilding: Vast and detailed Character development: Nice and steady Character design: Outstanding Dialogues: Realistic and Lifelike Pacing: Not fast nor too slow Writing quality: Magnificent Execution of the Genre: Good pitch Story potential: High Updating Stability: Steady MESSAGE I am deeply happy that the author joined spirity. As it has the potential to win! With more exposure, this will become great and even reach a million views! Or anime adaptation even a movie! Kudos on your work and See you in December (if you know what I mean) 😉 ADVICE I wanted to tell that few edits has to made. The typos not the grammar. You have fluid narration for me but the typos were the dilemma of its quality. Few edits has to be made for my advice. Capital letters, punctuations. Dialogues not starting with a capital letter and not ending with a comma or period. Welp, this is a wonderful story so I want it to be edited as I like it as a reader. It was normal to see these problems just when I started. But I overcome it, so you can do it too! 🙏 😉 Peace ✌️

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