Diving straight into the action with character introductions, the story does pride itself in a rather fast pace. The descriptions are solid and flows from one scene to another. There are occasional grammar mishaps which makes the reading experience a little strange, though doesn't detract from the actual experience of the story. The worldbuilding was layered in through occasional dialogue, sprinkled with just enough frequency. With some fixes in grammar and checks, this story can become much more. Keep it up!
Wicked_Snail
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