Review Detail of Slan in Fate/illusionary speed

It has a very bad drama, because you don't separate the text into more paragraphs, in my point of view reading a lot of text and having just a few paragraphs ruins the experience of reading a fanfic for me. In the few chapters the protagonist is able to 'Create' a true magic, it is simply too exaggerated. The protagonist's interactions with Kiritsugu are very forced, it feels like you're reading an essay.