webnovel
ClassyGay
ClassyGayLv133yr
2021-04-01 19:18

13+ chapters in and I can really say for sure that this one's a lot better than the original one, that one is not bad, but this one is a lot better. I just paraphrased what Daniiii said.🤷 For the writing quality, I'd give it a 5. Why? Because I want to. Ugh, because there are hardly any mistakes and grammatical errors. The words used to describe what is happening and what's in Evin's mind are able to express those scenes clearly. Story development, there are a lot of changes here that author made, and I love those changes. The pacing of the story isn't as slow as the original one, just as author promised. For the characters, I love the changes you made with each and every one of their own stories. I especially like the concept you thought of with Endra's spirit or whatever his name here is and Evin's. Now I'm wondering how different the other characters are. Lasty, this world background, author made a lot of changes, but I'm sure he will do a good job here. That's all for now... maybe will add a few things next time.

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Replies3
NakedApron
NakedApronAuthor

, I feel really giddy reading through these reviews xd

ClassyGay
ClassyGayLv13

Really? At least you liked it, can't really think straight right now, cause you know... I'm not straight. Kidding.

NakedApron:, I feel really giddy reading through these reviews xd
NakedApron
NakedApronAuthor

:3

ClassyGay:Really? At least you liked it, can't really think straight right now, cause you know... I'm not straight. Kidding.
Other Reviews
NakedApron
NakedApronAuthor

Author-san-special-five-star-review!!! 1st version! I want to say it’s the first and only version, but knowing me, I’m prob gonna have to change this one day or another. Anyhow, let’s get to the review. STORY DEVELOPMENT – Tone Okay, this time it’s really gonna be a grim-dark story. I know I said the same last time and it turned out to be a feel-good slice-of-life, but trust me, alright. Just read like, the first 2 chaps and you’ll see it. Obviously, it’s not gonna be all gloom and depression. Slice-of-life will happen (since I love it), there will be comedy, romance, action, adventure, and all that good stuff. One more thing I wanna add here is the mysteriousness of the novel. I know it sounds kinda pretentious coming from me, calling my novel mysterious and all, but what I mean is just that I’ll try my best to withhold certain info from the readers. The reason for this is that I ****ed up a lot on SotNeW, by explaining every detail of the story as they appeared. Not cool. STORY DEVELOPMENT – Pacing. Things will happen faster this time around. Last time, whenever I wrote a scene, almost always, I would stick it into the story without deleting it (even though they were completely filler), but I’ll do it this time. Scenes will die, since I’m gonna have a proper stockpile this time around. And also, Author-san ascended, and like, learned how to skip useless parts in scenes. Very epic. STORY DEVELOPMENT – Side Stories. Different POVs and other stories will appear more. I’ll just say that. Also, depending on stuff, I might rewrite previously written scenes in the POV of a different character. I’ll try to make this clearer as we go about the story. Also, remastered Layla story incoming, pog. And yes, I’ll take a part from that and chuck it into the synopsis. He-he-he. CHARACTERS – MC MC will have an interesting character arc this time around, how about that? CHARACTERS – Side charas. I have plans to tie more side charas to MC’s story, in a more intimate and non-conversational way. And t r y … to develop their arcs in that manner, but I’m not sure how that’ll work out in reality. It'll probably be okay. Oh yeah, also, Romance~~ WORLD-BUILDING I mentioned this before, but I’m gonna try to withhold certain information, so their reveal will be more satisfying later on. I know the older readers will have knowledge about some details due to the rewrite, but I’ll try my best to keep things spicy for everyone. MAGIC SYSTEM The fundamentals for this will not change, but I’m gonna add a lot of quality-of-life changes to the usage of Worlds. It will still be a Hard Magic System , but I’m gonna try and add a Softer side to it as well. SETTING and WORLD BACKGROUND Some things will be uncheatable, but they’ll be much rarer compared to the previous version. This will add a sense of risk to actions and give birth to more interesting choices. MISCELLANEOUS STUFF -No harem planned. -There will be cliches, but I’ll give them my own touch. I think you'll like it a lot. ----- Alright, I think that's it. Ask me if you have any questions ;3

killergut
killergutLv3
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