Review Detail of Minxs in Duality or destiny?

Okay. Let me just put out there that long dialogues easily confuse readers. You probably get this a lot, but it relates to a lot of other possible issues when writing. For example, grammar issues come up often throughout the story. Also, character personalities and world building are not detailed enough. The setting of the story is left up to the reader's imagination and forces a disconnect with the Author. This can have serious issues later down the line when your plot reveals itself. One, it could lead to a misinterpreted understanding of the character. Two, it could lead the reader to be dissatisfied with how you portray something later on that wasn't what they imagined. However, if you can pull off a dialogue type story with more self conscious thinking (monologues) it would leave a much stronger impression on the reader. I wish you the best of luck and hope for you to make an amazing story!