Review Detail of Overwrit in Thrown Into Hell (Slow Updates)
Review detail
I'm too lazy to give a long and well-structured review, so I'll just say the bad things. The MC is almost a SIMP, almost because he's not a virgin groveling at the feet of women, nor does he seem desperate, but every time he comes across a woman who needs something from him, he gives it to her. So, he's a SIMP who doesn't look entirely pathetic, that doesn't make him good, but he's bearable. Now then there's Toga, he just literally just bleeds out in the middle of anywhere to give her blood, because yeah, no reason, scripted so the harem is complete, but it has no basis, other than the fact that the MC is an undead, not an immortal undead, if he takes that much damage he's going to die, he dies in Dark Souls for a reason, and he doesn't throw himself into a fight regardless of dying in any. The story has a lot of script convenience for the harem the author has in mind to come out, but it has no basis or anything for the most part, and the MC is pretty, bad? I mean, he seems like your average protagonist who has a cold attitude but always helps out in any way he can.
Thrown Into Hell (Slow Updates)
BillNyeThePGGuy
Liked by 9 people
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Can you please specify at what point he's a simp? He gives Toga blood because it doesn't really inconvenience him, and he doesn't see a reason not to. I tried to make him apathetic within reason, if someone needs something from him, he'll do it if he doesn't have to go out of his way to do it. Regarding his personality, I've tried to make him apathetic without being completely uninterested in everything going on around him. If you want to say his interactions with villains are just for the plot, that's completely legitimate. Its more as filler to not only show Diluc's progress and strength but also to add some action to the BNHA universe as currently, he only really fights in Dark Souls. Thank you.
That the main problem with your MC, you can't make someone atypical without them losing interest in a lot of things around them. Have you never lost interest in anything? Or have you never felt that things around you become too normal, boring? That's something that happens, especially with an MC with that personality.
BillNyeThePGGuy:Can you please specify at what point he's a simp? He gives Toga blood because it doesn't really inconvenience him, and he doesn't see a reason not to. I tried to make him apathetic within reason, if someone needs something from him, he'll do it if he doesn't have to go out of his way to do it. Regarding his personality, I've tried to make him apathetic without being completely uninterested in everything going on around him. If you want to say his interactions with villains are just for the plot, that's completely legitimate. Its more as filler to not only show Diluc's progress and strength but also to add some action to the BNHA universe as currently, he only really fights in Dark Souls. Thank you.
That's true, I've done my best to keep most of his apathetic qualities while also making him care about a select few things. I thought I did a decent job, but considering your comments, I suppose not. Hopefully another novel strikes your fancy!
Overwrit:That the main problem with your MC, you can't make someone atypical without them losing interest in a lot of things around them. Have you never lost interest in anything? Or have you never felt that things around you become too normal, boring? That's something that happens, especially with an MC with that personality.