Since at the time of my review, there was only one chapter. I cannot say much about the world or plot yet. Maybe at a later time when the author posts more chapters is when I can alter my review once more. However, I will say it is a bit difficult for me to imagine the world even from the prologue. Mainly due to the reason that I do not know Avatar that well, but even then, as a reader, I should be able to picture the world a bit more, so I would suggest adding more of the world rather than dialogue in the prologue. Grammar errors are few, yet I can still spot some misplaced commas and run-on sentences, which can be corrected. Last but not least, I found the flow to be somewhat stiff. The only advice I can give you is the vary the way you started your sentences. So instead of saying ‘Macai’, try using ‘he’ or ‘young boy’ to describe the mc. Hopefully my advice is helpful enough, and keep up the good work, Author !
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LIKEExcellent, this is very helpful. For now, I have added two paragraphs to help explain the story. These paragraphs are modeled after the original introduction into the series. I hope that helps. Later, I will reanalyze the first chapter to see if anything else can be added to increase description without taking away from the story. Your feedback is greatly appreciated. I also will consider the other nuggets of advice you left.
What will be ur update schedule??
Brian_Hanes_117:Excellent, this is very helpful. For now, I have added two paragraphs to help explain the story. These paragraphs are modeled after the original introduction into the series. I hope that helps. Later, I will reanalyze the first chapter to see if anything else can be added to increase description without taking away from the story. Your feedback is greatly appreciated. I also will consider the other nuggets of advice you left.