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Jimar_Jemar
Jimar_JemarLv43yr
2020-12-15 17:31

5 experience points 5 experience points 5 experience points 5 experience points 5 experience points 5 experience points 5 experience points 5 experience points

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Other Reviews
DonnyRuckles
DonnyRucklesLv3
shacochan
shacochanLv13

This review will be for the story preceding the return arc as I have issues with it. The world building is great. I liked how everything was developing in an exciting manner that could lead to an interesting plot point. The description of characters and places however are not properly described. The characters are okay. By no means are they bland. Characters have unique personalities and their actions mirror them. There is a problem with how characters are sent off and how characters develop. It feels as if the author skipped showing us how a character went from a to b opting to show the result instead. Which bring me to my greatest issue. The writing was great. The paces was marching proud and steadily. Characters were allocated appropriate time in the spotlight before moving on which was what hooked me into reading the story. It all changed when the 'return' arc attacked. The pacing was too slow. Chapters upon chapters just to describe a single event and they still did not help in describing the event taking place. The use of conjunctions and whatever filler I'm sure the author is aware of is scrambled in every sentence. The showing of the writing in your early chapters gradually became telling. Sentences are repeated constantly during and after the return arc. I stopped reading at 133 partially because the writing kept triggering me but mostly because of the wolf arc. The author could've done so much more. Many chapters were written leading to that moment but the result was disappointing. It couldve been so much more 1 way or the other. Since you did not see it as an author, I could not help but question whether the future of your writing would be as bland as that moment. By no means is it a bad story. One of the better ones out there. Sadly I am a hard one to please.

Daoist_ChaosLord
Daoist_ChaosLordLv6
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