webnovel
Chitawulf
ChitawulfLv34yr
2020-10-03 12:14

I really love how you dive right into the action. Your writing style is very action-based, there are a lot of vivid and powerful verbs and sensory image that you use that really keep the momentum going and the atmosphere intact. I really like how thoughts are italicized. However, the book is hard to read because you don't insert line breaks during dialogue and during key moments, which breaks the flow a little. Having very short paragraphs with a few words is a very effective way to keep tension. Try this: The flash of scattering heat filled the place and tormented the flesh of two people agonizing in pain, screaming and desperately crawling to get out. Beep beep beep beep. The annoying sound of the alarm clock buzzed to her ears which made her jump and gasp for air. Also, whenever a character says something, insert a line break/make a new paragraph. Other than that, spectacular work!

Patient's curse and within

Glenstonx
4.7
14 Chs

Liked by 2 people

LIKE
Replies1
Glenstonx
GlenstonxAuthor

Thank you for the honest opinion :D I really needed that

4yr
Other Reviews
SleepyKola
SleepyKolaLv12

Great job! The author had an amazing way to describe the horror and thrill for the readers to enjoy. However I can't say much about the developments of the plots because there are only few chapters, so Good work Author, keep updating

4yr

Oemar_danoes
Oemar_danoesLv3

I'm admiring the story and plot... The characters are comprehensive for the story. This story just makes me wanna wriggle and feel tingly within.

4yr
Esther_Heredia
Esther_HerediaLv2

One of my favorite genres is terror, that's one of the reasons I liked your story. Although it's very few chapters, your story seems to be on the right track. I think the way you tell it all is very good, it makes you want more and more. Congratulations, keep it up!

4yr
Gaureeey
GaureeeyLv1

glen, i''m in awe of your work. After reading 'surrender to grief' i wanted to explore your literary gift, horror and thrillers are someething ive always been interested in, the action, the writing style everything is amazing.!

4yr
Dugzaw
DugzawLv1

I enjoy your style of writing. I can tell you're passionate with your words and the stories you develop. I commend your ability to tackle horror and suspense. It is challenging. You develop characters and detail almost automatically. Good work.

4yr
kakigori
kakigoriLv2

Hi there! Here's your review. Just a heads-up though - I'm more accustomed to doing really really long critiques, so this one might be a bit janky. Now, I'm not exactly qualified to critique horror/thriller because it really isn't my cup of tea, but I'll try my best to critique what I am familiar with: Namely, your characters. I'll be honest here - I quite like Rose. Her interactions with other characters and her little internal thoughts are oddly endearing and realistic. She does have some slip-ups, but they're not too bad to the extent that my suspension of disbelief is broken. Overall, she is quite a fascinating main character and she's grown on me a lot over the few chapters I've read thus far. The vibe you have going for your setting is i m m a c u l a t e. The way they're written kinda gives me the whole 'flickering lights in an empty hallway' sorta vibe, and it absolutely suits this story. It's also not like the few other horror stories I've read thus far. You don't really overdo it on the gore and I'm grateful that you haven't used it for the cheap shock factor, which is nice. To summarise - Rose is an excellent character, and the setting descriptions hit all the right spots. The lady in the elevator too. Chapter Two in particularly was actually pretty scary. You really do get a feel of what young Mr Anderson was going through. Everything just radiates feelings of kenopsia - it feels hollow and empty, and depending on what you were going for that turned out really really well. Definitely suits the thriller vibe. soooo yeah here's my review. hope i helped out!

4yr
SolAce
SolAceLv3

Reveal spoiler

4yr
Zoro_The_Dark
Zoro_The_DarkLv3

Damn this mystery thriller novel is so gooood. I'm really loving it. I would suggest you to increase your update stability. This book's writing quality and story development is really something!

4yr
Glenstonx
GlenstonxAuthor

Hi!! author here~~ just want to say thank you for reading this book and adding them to your libaraies and reading lists, I truly appreciate it since it gives me motivation to continue this story, I hooe to see you all vote for my book and give me your honest opinions to improve my writings, thank you all !! :))

4yr
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