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Makinzy_Stroud
Makinzy_StroudLv111yr
2023-05-23 11:55

the best fan fiction I've ever read, it's a good idea, fast paced, and the amount of updates makes me very happy lol

Liked by 3 people

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Replies9
DragonslayerKnight
DragonslayerKnightLv4

this must be the first fanfiction you've ever read

DAOIST_SUPREME
DAOIST_SUPREMELv4

lol ๐Ÿ˜‚

DragonslayerKnight:this must be the first fanfiction you've ever read
DAOIST_SUPREME
DAOIST_SUPREMELv4

This is the author's alternative account, he only commented on three novels, and the three were posted by this account that posted naruto's novel

DragonslayerKnight:this must be the first fanfiction you've ever read
mow
mowLv4

Yikes

DragonslayerKnight
DragonslayerKnightLv4

over stood

DAOIST_SUPREME: This is the author's alternative account, he only commented on three novels, and the three were posted by this account that posted naruto's novel
CruelReality
CruelRealityLv4

Bit of a stretch

CruelReality
CruelRealityLv4

Wait this is the authors account, cmon bro this makes me not want to read your fanfic and my hopes were highโ€ฆ

Balthizar_Blake
Balthizar_BlakeAuthor

it's the only fan fiction she's ever read as her interest is in romance novels and only read, and left a review on my books because she's my wife.

CruelReality:Wait this is the authors account, cmon bro this makes me not want to read your fanfic and my hopes were highโ€ฆ
Rizki_Caturianto
Rizki_CaturiantoLv1

Not the best I ever read.. But I can say one of the best ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜

Other Reviews
GottDesLichts
GottDesLichtsLv4

Overall I give the story a 2.6/5. If I were to ignore the fact that this is the authors first story, this would be the result. However for a first try I would personally rate it a 3.6 or a little bit higher as its main flaw is the authors inexperience with creating storylines that are coherent and sensible, and characters that feel believable. The author seemingly has potential as long as they properly think out the development of the story. The story has average writing quality, generally unnoticeable mistakes unless you look for them, but a few issues here and there for legibility. Generally the story doesn't captivate or immerse the reader well enough to warrant the full five.(4/5) About two chapters a day, 12 hours between each post. I suspect there will be a hiatus eventually, but that is just a suspicion. (4/5) The story development follows an awkward and sometimes bizarre path of logic, while managing to follow tropes poorly in some cases. An example being the commonly found evil second personality trope, this is done pretty poorly due to the fact that it comes along out of nowhere and isn't developed in a proper way. Another example being the jump in logic Sarutobi makes when sending the protagonist to the orphanage.(1/5) The character design is poor at best, Kakashi doesn't feel like Kakashi, Naruto feels like Generic Charismatic Character Number #612. The main character is also bland and unappealing, in the chapters I have read there has been no underlying goal or ambition set for the protagonist. (2/5) World background unfortunately isn't much better, uses fanfiction tropes for Naruto. Tropes like him getting stoned as a child, which is done especially poorly due to the fact that this is explained when they are four, by which most children even if as strong as a normal adult would have broken bones or dying if hit in the head with a stone thrown by an adult who would probably not hold back. (2/5)

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