webnovel
sunakodwallflower
sunakodwallflowerLv104yr
2020-11-01 15:28

i am giving you 5.0 stars.since. i love the whole plot of the story.even though i know you are still editing it.why don't you add more actions of the characters? for example when bullets were fired.nicholas.hid behind a metal trash bin? and if he is being rained with bullets. why don't you put in a little more effect? not just saying dodging.say a little more. like: nicholas zigzagged to dodge the bullets, so that he won't get hit. bullets only shoot in a straight line after all. and a little bit more actions. in the fighting. this author is still improving. but you have it all laid out for the story already. kudos to you and your friends.i hope the three of you become successful authors.<3 oh and have backstories for the other characters too like nicholas adoptive father for example.as well as his family why did his family resent him so much.and the like.that's all from me.don't give up on this! ;)

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ALLEY
ALLEYAuthor

Thanks for the review, I'll gladly use what you said in improving THANKS AGAINNN

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