First of all, your grammar is great and your writing flows really well and it's easy to read. The characters are well developed and I love how it's written from both main characters' point of view. That's really unique and enjoyable and great for getting in their heads. I also love how your writing style is totally different for the two characters. It really makes them feel like separate people and you can immediately tell who's speaking even if you didn't know beforehand. There's a lot of telling instead of showing in this book, especially from Aka's point of view. Even straight off the bat, she says the city is lively and wonderful compared to her small town, along with many other things. That can be good for developing her way of viewing the world, but a city being "wonderful and lively" doesn't paint as solid of a picture as saying something like "the throngs of bustling, happy people and joyous conversation feel so fresh compared to the quiet hum of my small town home." As such, the world isn't as well developed as the characters. Just work on that and you're all set! This is a great novel and I wish you luck in your journey <3
succulentgumbo
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