Hello author! Your story has potential, I must say. However, i think it really needs a lot of work. For me the pace on your story is really fast, i can't seem to catch up. Like one second, Andrew's injured, then the next thing he's already in the hospital. You may also add dialogue to break down the pace of the story. Correct usage of punctuation is also needed.Character design needs work as well, like add more descriptive words? Idk. Reading other works in your genre may also help. But nonetheless, your story's interesting and unique. Not everyone can make a historical fiction so kudos for that. :D
ImperialWriter25
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