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Review Detail of mssuigeneris in Milky Legends (English)

Review detail

mssuigeneris
mssuigenerisLv33yrmssuigeneris

The best part of this work is the novelty behind its hybrid concept which incorporates the use of both magic and technology within its world. That's definitely an interesting new idea worthy of being praised in and of itself. However, the thing that hinders this from getting more attention is probably the writing. Let me comment on the ff points: Writing - needs improvement. In the early chapters that I've read, I pointed out quite a few errors and suggestions on how to possibly remedy them. I noticed about the overuse of character names in every chapter (every paragraph, esp). Please proofread and edit. Utilize some pronouns (he, she, his, her, etc.) to make the read more pleasant. Also, make the dialogues more interactive by adding emotions to the characters' thoughts and actions. Instead of saying "___ said", try being creative by putting it this way "___ knitted his eyebrows in confusion after hearing those words from her" or something. I think its more fun that way. Stability - keep it up Characters - they were well-described, tho I prefer a slow-burn *romance??* between the two leads, because hehe.... Maybe that's just meh. Development and World - vis-a-vis my comment on the writing. The imagination behind the world is really commendable, and I'm sure it can be improved with more practice. Cheers đŸ„‚

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Milky Legends (English)

Stevent1679

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Stevent1679
Stevent1679AuthorStevent1679

I don't know what else to say. Your suggestions and criticism really help me. I want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart. I finally understood the important points of writing this novel. Not only applies in foreign languages, but also the use of artistic sentences is very important. I am aware, I am still weak in writing my English. But your suggestions and criticisms motivate me. I am very happy to hear that from you. 😊 Hopefully your novel will soon become a top writer. I always wish you success in this writing career. Ganbatte! Sensei.. Thank You so much... I will improve it.

mssuigeneris
mssuigenerisLv3mssuigeneris

Thank you for taking this lightly. You're most welcome.

Stevent1679:I don't know what else to say. Your suggestions and criticism really help me. I want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart. I finally understood the important points of writing this novel. Not only applies in foreign languages, but also the use of artistic sentences is very important. I am aware, I am still weak in writing my English. But your suggestions and criticisms motivate me. I am very happy to hear that from you. 😊 Hopefully your novel will soon become a top writer. I always wish you success in this writing career. Ganbatte! Sensei.. Thank You so much... I will improve it.