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Legendary_Person
Legendary_PersonLv54yr
2020-06-16 06:33

This story is awesome, our not much is known about our Mc other than him not being from Forks and his self-hatred and guilt towards his sister who is suffering from Coma. The Mc is a shapeshifter who imprinted on Edward's sister, he is a bit clumsy about his behaviour around Edward's sister and is overall a proper teenager with a slightly mature personality though he is still controlled by his emotions. The writing quality is top-notch, the background development needs a little work though I wouldn't judge yet as not many chapters have been posted. Character development is very high and overall you must give this a try. I do hope that Mc thinks more about himself and his safety instead of Edward's sister and try to master phasing as soon as possible after all, he should be able to take care of enemy vampires. Just work on his personality a bit more and I hope to see him act more maturely around a potential danger who are the Cullens. The world is cruel and no one can be trusted and he even has to take care of his sister in a coma so it will be better to act 'professional'.

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Legendary_Person
Legendary_PersonLv5

Update:-The Mc is a hybrid between shapeshifters and Child of the moon who are cannibalistic in nature. Mc is very strong in his base form without phasing (which have happened only once) and his personality is good, he isn't naive and understands the danger known as vampire.

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