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phoenixhyperion
phoenixhyperionLv133yr
2021-01-12 20:07

First of all, I love how you describe your world background. It's so detailed that induces us, readers, to picture out what the world really looks like in your story. The characters too, well portrayed if I may say. Now, for the critic, I'd rather suggest you proofread the chapters. The thought is there, the flow is there. But sometimes, these ideas are either chunk, misspelled, or unrelatedly joined together in a sentence which makes us, readers, confused. But, if you fix that, I'm sure this story will come out splendidly than it already is! I commend you for your work author! Great job!

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Dream_land
Dream_landAuthor

Thank you, reader-chan I will pay attention to it as i post the next chapter's in the future. I hope you love and support my book !!

phoenixhyperion
phoenixhyperionLv13

Of course! I wish you luck, sakka -san ^^

Dream_land:Thank you, reader-chan I will pay attention to it as i post the next chapter's in the future. I hope you love and support my book !!
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