Review Detail of mobcharacter in MY IDOL LOVER

Although i'm not fond of romances and what i say will probably not hold any water i'll try and leave a decent review. First, there are a lot of things that need improvement. Capitalizasion, commas and the apostrophe should be added. Though most already have the things stated above, there are some that are missed and should probably changed. Second, using korean jargons like "oppa" or "samcheon" should be used less as me and probably some other readers don't know their definition although there's the author's thoughts that have the translation, it should be changed to their meanings like samcheon to uncle. Third, the sentences and word choice can further be improved so that it will be easier to understand. I wont touch upon the topic of idols or whatever since i'm not really experienced in that area however the story should not only rotate around the idols and main character. Remember you are writing a story not a your fantasy. You can have proper world building like explaining more about the main characters like how powerful is the main character's company or rumors about the idols or the idol's character or whatever. Anyways, this book is ok and it's already something good considering it's the author's first work. Please don't hate me :(