Review Detail of CouchSurfingDragon in :) deleted

I like what you have so far, Author! Concerning your English: Your tense and conjugation are perfect. I saw a few missing "indefinite articles", ie. you are ***** vs you are 'an' *****. A few sentences have slightly non-native speaker awkwardness, ie. Maybe you want to go for a walk vs Would you like to go for a walk? I found one missing preposition, ie. do you want vs Do you want 'to' [go to the town?] And I saw a missing "does" in a question, ie. Anyone lives here vs. Does anyone live here? It's a strange addition-word to some questions that I honestly cannot explain, but can place in a sentence because I'm a native speaker. Concerning your writing: Starting from your first chapter, you convey strong actions that evoke a powerful sense of an audience reaction. Fear is huge, with the excellent contrast of a calm older woman. There is an unfair beating, evoking a sense of anger. Well done. I love your usage of complex descriptions. The man's skin isn't pale. It's alabaster, implying that he doesn't work outside. The coat isn't expensive. It's worth at least 10 slaves, plus more if he's smart. Concerning your pacing: I'm not quite sure if it's your writing style or if your words translate so beautifully, but your pacing is slow. This is fine. When there is anger, the anger is perfectly depicted, it is slow, it is powerful. When there is sweetness, as in between the FL and the ML, there is a wonderful beauty as the woman is getting flustered over ink on paper. There is a gentleness in how the man looks to her and pleads with her not to call him by his title. On top of that, your action contrast is fantastic. Even in chapter 1, the opening is very harsh, very oppressive, with the latter half of it sweet and hopeful. And this happens further, going from the MC to the spellcasting murderer in the other chapter. Concerning your content: Your verbiage is excellent. The way you describe scenes is excellent. What you are trying to write about, I see what you're trying to communicate. Thus far, it's very simple, almost plain. But as I mentioned earlier, there is beauty in simple scenes. The conflict and drama come in other ways-- with running away from thugs, with the murderous spellcaster. You may write more complex scenes, or you may continue how you are. However, I cannot give you a "true" criticism on the plot, since 4 chapters is not nearly enough to judge. All in all, Author, you are an excellent writer. Do not let your worry of being a non-native English speaker hamper your writing. You are far, far better at English than many of my other new-author peers, in verbiage, in sentence structure, in tense, and conjugation-- with the only flaws related to colloquialisms and rare, nonsensical English sentence structuring rules. (Also, -1 point for irregular updates. Haha!)